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sandwitch
10-10-2014, 07:16 PM
bodies are weird and sometimes kinda gross. genitals are the weirdest.

I think I might have a bartholin's cyst (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartholin%27s_cyst) *NSFW*. it's like a funny fluid-filled sac on the side of my labia that doesn't hurt or itch, but it can get in the way and makes me nervous. I've heard of them popping, and I think I do not want that to happen.

now everyone share stories about weird things that have happened to their genitals so I don't feel lonely here.

oxyjen
10-10-2014, 07:19 PM
Some people consider this weird, though I don't--I'm currently using a DivaCup and it's awesome. Tampons feel like sandpaper in comparison.

sandwitch
10-10-2014, 07:24 PM
I don't think that's weird, but I enjoy opportunities to talk about menstrual cups. I started using the diva cup a few years ago and now the thought of tampons make me queasy. bleached cotton in MY vagina? fuck that noise.

LordLatch
10-10-2014, 08:17 PM
bartholin's cyst

You aren't the only one here with that.


now everyone share stories about weird things that have happened to their genitals so I don't feel lonely here.



During the age of 12ish, my urethra would grow skin over it. Every day before the first urination, I had to tear a myself a new hole- yes it is as gruesome as it sounds. Finally fixed with surgery.

sandwitch
10-10-2014, 08:27 PM
You aren't the only one here with that.

Have you done anything with it? I was poking at it a bit then read somewhere that it's probably not a good idea. I'm going to start doing sitz baths more regularly and maybe take more ibuprofen to counter sex aggravation.



During the age of 12ish, my urethra would grow skin over it. Every day before the first urination, I had to tear a myself a new hole- yes it is as gruesome as it sounds. Finally fixed with surgery.

Wow, excellent contribution! I am properly horrified!

Osito Polar
10-10-2014, 08:30 PM
I think I might have a bartholin's cyst (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartholin%27s_cyst).

GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. I clicked that link assuming it would be a text description.

Not work safe because of vajay photo. Possible brain-scarring may occur. Use only in moderation.

You ... how could you?

And ... umm ... personally I think if I was visited by one of those I would be sorely tempted to stick a pin in it. Like, I would think about that a lot even knowing it was a terrible idea.

LordLatch
10-10-2014, 08:31 PM
Have you done anything with it? I was poking at it a bit then read somewhere that it's probably not a good idea. I'm going to start doing sitz baths more regularly and maybe take more ibuprofen to counter sex aggravation.

No that wasn't me. I'm pretty sure she had it corrected.

sandwitch
10-10-2014, 08:35 PM
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. I clicked that link assuming it would be a text description.

Not work safe because of vajay. Possible brain-scarring may occur. Use only in moderation.

You ... how could you?

I added a nsfw tag, but really Oso. This is a thread about weird things that happen to genitals.

****thread not safe for people who expect genitals to look like pr0n vids****

msg_v2
10-10-2014, 08:39 PM
I had bumps on my penis I was worried about (where would I have gotten it from?) . They only showed up when it was erect. I went to see a urologist to get it checked out, and it turned out to be nothing.

Perdix
10-10-2014, 08:42 PM
All I thought when I saw that was: hmm... interesting. You should definitely get that fixed though, might hinder your sex life.

Polemarch
10-10-2014, 08:52 PM
Omg you people all have cooties! Feel judged.

I'm going to second the whole "pop that thing" movement, because seriously, just pop that thing and see what happens. It's not my labia.

Osito Polar
10-10-2014, 09:00 PM
I added a nsfw tag, but really Oso. This is a thread about weird things that happen to genitals.

****thread not safe for people who expect genitals to look like pr0n vids****

Well, really more because I did that clenchy shoulder motion when you're in an office and realize you've clicked on something where a person behind you might see it and say "Hey, what's that you're looking at?" and you try to click Back as quickly as possible and then fucking Firefox decides to just sit there.

I'm all right now but during the immediate ninety seconds it was traumatizing. Thank you for your concern.

Perdix
10-10-2014, 09:03 PM
Well, really more because I did that clenchy shoulder motion when you're in an office and realize you've clicked on something where a person behind you might see it and say "Hey, what's that you're looking at?" and you try to click Back as quickly as possible and then fucking Firefox decides to just sit there.

I'm all right now.

Off topic: When I was in highschool I downloaded Halo 2 on all the school computers and we would play massive 30+ person games on the local network. Hilarious to watch the shoulder clenching motion when a teacher came in the room.

sandwitch
10-10-2014, 09:18 PM
I had bumps on my penis I was worried about (where would I have gotten it from?) . They only showed up when it was erect. I went to see a urologist to get it checked out, and it turned out to be nothing.

You use the past tense, which leads me to believe that the spider eggs in your penis hatched successfully.

msg_v2
10-10-2014, 09:29 PM
You use the past tense, which leads me to believe that the spider eggs in your penis hatched successfully.

They were scorpion eggs, not spider eggs.

Sistamatic
10-10-2014, 09:46 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, the penis of the spiny echidna:

http://i1-news.softpedia-static.com/images/news2/Why-Do-Echidnas-Have-Four-Headed-Penises-2.jpg

LordLatch
10-10-2014, 09:47 PM
They were scorpion eggs, not spider eggs.

Gotta stab those out.

Hephaestus
10-10-2014, 09:52 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, the penis of the spiny echidna
Welp. Thanks for the nightmare fuel. Looks like it used to be able to grasp things before it got its fingers chopped off in woodchuck-shop.

rincon
10-10-2014, 11:23 PM
CAN'T UNSEE

msg_v2
10-10-2014, 11:34 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, the penis of the spiny echidna:

http://i1-news.softpedia-static.com/images/news2/Why-Do-Echidnas-Have-Four-Headed-Penises-2.jpg

I love monotremes.

*crickets*

In a non-sexual way, of course. Animal penises are also remarkable in their diversity.

Also, I don't really find the OP image disgusting. If you want something that's actually gross, I can find some STD pictures.

Oh, also, I like Georgia O'Keefe.

ferrus
10-10-2014, 11:45 PM
Animal penises are also emerging in their diversity.
http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-strangest-genitalia-in-the-animal-kingdom.php Yeah.

Deckard
10-10-2014, 11:49 PM
I have two urethras. It doesn't seem to affect anything and I haven't yet figured out how to take advantage of it.

msg_v2
10-10-2014, 11:58 PM
http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-strangest-genitalia-in-the-animal-kingdom.php Yeah.

Exactly. I'm disappointed that they didn't mention octopi genitalia, though. Also... "emerging" makes no sense there; "remarkable" works better. I shouldn't make posts on my phone.

Osito Polar
10-11-2014, 12:00 AM
I have two urethras. It doesn't seem to affect anything and I haven't yet figured out how to take advantage of it.

How does that work, exactly? Did nature equip you with two streams? What happens when you cross them? Can you pee with twice the volume of a regular human?

Catoptric
10-11-2014, 12:01 AM
Even when someone doesn't have a genital, it's still possible to play footsie:
http://www.rapidhomeremedies.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/How-to-Get-Rid-of-Genital-Warts.jpg

Eventually it can transform you into a tree:
http://ecofrenhealth.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/image007.jpg?w=570

Deckard
10-11-2014, 12:11 AM
How does that work, exactly? Did nature equip you with two streams? What happens when you cross them? Can you pee with twice the volume of a regular human?

You never cross the streams. Actually I don't know for sure whether both are functional, but it's statistically more likely that only one is. In rare cases people can have two bladders, with a urethra for each.

Madrigal
10-11-2014, 02:04 AM
My ex said I have sagittarian genitals. I want to think this has nothing to do with horses.

This is one of those posts I'm going to regret making. :nerd:

MuseedesBeauxArts
10-11-2014, 02:14 AM
My ex said I have sagittarian genitals. I want to think this has nothing to do with horses.

This is one of those posts I'm going to regret making. :nerd:

I think he might have been calling you heartless. And/or a slut. Who didn't expect head in return. :ph34r:

From the magic of the internet: "They crave adventure and excitement and welcome change with open arms; freedom is so important to Sagittarius that they will actually make decisions based on the amount of freedom that is given by the choice they have made" and "Sagittarius make excellent friends because of their encouraging, positive nature and their kind heart that will do anything to make sure the friend is happy. They do not expect favors in return, their kindness is selfless."

Madrigal
10-11-2014, 02:19 AM
I think he might have been calling you heartless. And/or a slut. Who didn't expect head in return. :ph34r:

From the magic of the internet: "They crave adventure and excitement and welcome change with open arms; freedom is so important to Sagittarius that they will actually make decisions based on the amount of freedom that is given by the choice they have made" and "Sagittarius make excellent friends because of their encouraging, positive nature and their kind heart that will do anything to make sure the friend is happy. They do not expect favors in return, their kindness is selfless."

:lol:

I thought he had just fucked the entire zodiac several times over and had imagined common physical characteristics, so I guess I like this interpretation better.

Sloth
10-11-2014, 02:20 AM
I have seen some things in my day, but I never saw a cyst like that of the op's posting.

Dear mother of god get that fixed, that can't be good for you. Of course sex will feel irritating! Holy crap. Much love girl! Shit looks scary :(

MuseedesBeauxArts
10-11-2014, 02:29 AM
Here's a fun thing that happens: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12423816

msg_v2
10-11-2014, 03:48 AM
Here's a fun thing that happens: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12423816

I didn't know that could happen to clits. I'd heard of priapism of the penis, of course. If you have an erection lasting for more than four hours...

pensive_pilgrim
10-11-2014, 04:53 AM
If you have an erection lasting for more than four hours...

I thought that was something to be proud of

C.J.Woolf
10-11-2014, 05:04 AM
Here's a fun thing that happens: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12423816

The abstract fails to answer the key question: HOW BIG WAS IT?

Limes
10-11-2014, 05:46 AM
I clicked on the large version of the picture and the vagina started speaking, it said, "my name...<slurp>...is Joan Merrick"
Very difficult to masturbate to.

starla
10-11-2014, 05:47 AM
One time after a particularly rough bout of sex, one of my labium (?) was swelled up to the size of a pork chop. It was numb. I was worried that I'd have to go to the hospital and have it cut off or something but the swelling went away by the time I got to work that morning.

rhinosaur
10-11-2014, 05:58 AM
one of my labium (?)

Labia

Replace it with another word, e.g. "One of my boobs" v. "one of my boob." The plural form is correct.

Limes
10-11-2014, 06:01 AM
Somebody's not going to be beating on any labium, or labia tonight.

starla
10-11-2014, 06:01 AM
Labia

Replace it with another word, e.g. "One of my boobs" v. "one of my boob." The plural form is correct.

Thanks for your concern.

rhinosaur
10-11-2014, 06:03 AM
She asked.

jigglypuff
10-11-2014, 07:30 AM
bodies are weird and sometimes kinda gross. genitals are the weirdest.

I think I might have a bartholin's cyst (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartholin%27s_cyst) *NSFW*. it's like a funny fluid-filled sac on the side of my labia that doesn't hurt or itch, but it can get in the way and makes me nervous. I've heard of them popping, and I think I do not want that to happen.

now everyone share stories about weird things that have happened to their genitals so I don't feel lonely here.
omg, i'm pretty sure i had this exact thing once. i remember "treating" it by taking hot baths and just trying my best to not touch or irritate it. it eventually just shrunk and disappeared. mine was a little sensitive and painful, though. it sux, i'm sorry & hope it goes away soon. :(

attila_the_hunny
10-11-2014, 01:52 PM
bodies are weird and sometimes kinda gross. genitals are the weirdest.

I think I might have a bartholin's cyst (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartholin%27s_cyst) *NSFW*. it's like a funny fluid-filled sac on the side of my labia that doesn't hurt or itch, but it can get in the way and makes me nervous. I've heard of them popping, and I think I do not want that to happen.

now everyone share stories about weird things that have happened to their genitals so I don't feel lonely here.

Dude. I had one of those and was in the hospital on Christmas Eve to get it lanced. It popped up again a few days later. It got infected and I had to have surgery immediately. I was in the hospital for 3 days. I think I got the marsupialization surgery. No more problems now!

My cyst was literally the size of a chicken's egg. It was awful.

LordLatch
10-11-2014, 02:53 PM
Must be nice to be symmetrical again.
http://i.imgur.com/J8KMVoF.png

gator
10-11-2014, 03:55 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, the penis of the spiny echidna:

http://i1-news.softpedia-static.com/images/news2/Why-Do-Echidnas-Have-Four-Headed-Penises-2.jpg

Did you know that the erect penis of the spiny echidna is 1/3 the total length of it's body? Also, echidna sperm looks like little swimming wigs.

My last day in Canada my parents were watching this show about animal sex with these people who were really really into animal sex and they masturbated an echidna to make it come out.

I won't lie... the whole show kind of made me squirm uncomfortably.

Also, kangaroos have 3 vaginas.

sandwitch
10-11-2014, 04:02 PM
omg, i'm pretty sure i had this exact thing once. i remember "treating" it by taking hot baths and just trying my best to not touch or irritate it. it eventually just shrunk and disappeared. mine was a little sensitive and painful, though. it sux, i'm sorry & hope it goes away soon. :(

Thanks! It got a little bigger than it is now earlier this spring and shrinked, so I hope it does the same.


Dude. I had one of those and was in the hospital on Christmas Eve to get it lanced. It popped up again a few days later. It got infected and I had to have surgery immediately. I was in the hospital for 3 days. I think I got the marsupialization surgery. No more problems now!

My cyst was literally the size of a chicken's egg. It was awful.

Oh god that sounds terrible. How long did it take to heal after surgery?

joft
10-11-2014, 07:12 PM
I have male genitalia, but I really really really like the female ones.

attila_the_hunny
10-11-2014, 08:06 PM
Oh god that sounds terrible. How long did it take to heal after surgery?

I couldn't have "sexual relations" for 2 weeks, but it was ok when I got out of the hospital. Sitting down or being in a bumpy car ride was really uncomfortable, though. I'm just happy it's over and not recurring.

attila_the_hunny
10-11-2014, 08:08 PM
Some people consider this weird, though I don't--I'm currently using a DivaCup and it's awesome. Tampons feel like sandpaper in comparison.

Those things are awesome. I call them Cunt Cups. I'm classy like that.

jigglypuff
10-11-2014, 08:31 PM
Some people consider this weird, though I don't--I'm currently using a DivaCup and it's awesome. Tampons feel like sandpaper in comparison.
i'm gonna have natural periods again soon & have been considering getting one as well as trying reusable cloth pads. i don't know anyone who actually uses the reusable cloth stuff & not sure if it's just a stupid trend among the whole foods "green" living crowd but i like the idea of saving money and material. it can't be too different than when you accidentally leave a panty liner in the wash & it comes out clean...

it's been several years since my bleeding has been heavy enough for tampons, so that's kinda nice.

LordLatch
10-11-2014, 08:41 PM
Using a maxipad feels like you're riding a horse.

rincon
10-11-2014, 09:58 PM
^ when have you had occasion to wear one?

NedLudd
10-11-2014, 10:26 PM
^ when have you had occasion to wear one?

After reading that, I'm considering trying it for a day. I've always wanted to try riding a horse.

LordLatch
10-11-2014, 11:38 PM
^ when have you had occasion to wear one?

You know, I don't bombard you with questions aside from this one, do I?

rincon
10-12-2014, 12:10 AM
You know, I don't bombard you with questions aside from this one, do I?

You don't. But I would hardly consider one question a bombardment. Prying, perhaps. I thought maybe it might provide an opportunity for you to post in the confessions thread. :whistle:

LordLatch
10-12-2014, 12:18 AM
I thought maybe it might provide an opportunity for you to post in the confessions thread. :whistle:

That was thoughtful, but alas, I shall decline.

rincon
10-12-2014, 12:23 AM
That was thoughtful, but alas, I shall decline.

Gotta work that mysterious angle.

Sloth
10-12-2014, 12:27 AM
Using a maxipad feels like you're riding a horse.

Not nowadays. Pads are so incredibly thin now that they're barely noticeable. I swear by the pad.

I've never heard of diva cups, or "cunt cups" as attila so eloquently put it. I googled them and they look scary :(

stuck
10-12-2014, 03:38 AM
Ptomely, Copernicus: they were wrong.

TeresaJ
10-12-2014, 04:08 AM
Not nowadays. Pads are so incredibly thin now that they're barely noticeable. I swear by the pad.

I've never heard of diva cups, or "cunt cups" as attila so eloquently put it. I googled them and they look scary :(

I have a diva cup and it's great! Anything else now seems wasteful. Haven't used it in a while, though. Best side effect of pregnancy and breastfeeding is no menstruation for at least a year.

Speaking of genitalia, I did have some tearing (second degree) during the delivery. It didn't bother me much, but when I finally got around to feeling like trying to have sex again (at like 6 weeks) my perineum seemed really weird where I had torn - like the skin was askew where it grew back together. It was pretty minor but it still freaked me out. Thankfully over the next few months everything went back to normal.

sandwitch
10-13-2014, 03:56 PM
i'm gonna have natural periods again soon & have been considering getting one as well as trying reusable cloth pads. i don't know anyone who actually uses the reusable cloth stuff & not sure if it's just a stupid trend among the whole foods "green" living crowd but i like the idea of saving money and material. it can't be too different than when you accidentally leave a panty liner in the wash & it comes out clean...

it's been several years since my bleeding has been heavy enough for tampons, so that's kinda nice.

The first few days of my period are very heavy, so I use both a cup and homemade cloth pads. I've been using the cloth pads for a few years now- they can be inconvenient, especially when traveling, but it's been worth it for me. The disposable pads have some kind of chemical or texture that irritates my skin. Plus, the advantage of reducing waste and products that I have to buy every month.

I find the etsy menstrual pad sellers very interesting.

Faust
05-15-2015, 03:21 PM
I'm getting an ultrasound to verify whether I have cancer of the balls. Most likely not. There's a small, hard bump which is consistent with the way that type of cancer is described. Early detection would mean I would probably be ok.

gator
05-15-2015, 09:50 PM
^ Good luck. Hope it's nothing serious!

I have only two things to add to this thread:

One time I developed a really massive, hard lump on my labia that began to hurt and make it uncomfortable to sit. I became quite concerned but it turned out to be a pimple. When it finally popped it gushed almost a teaspoon's worth of pus and blood and then took three more days to finish draining and scab over.

Also, I approve of menstrual cups. Not perfect, by any means, but I definitely like the less spending and less waste aspect. Also I'm morbidly fascinated by the sight of my own bodily fluids.

attila_the_hunny
05-16-2015, 01:14 AM
Admittedly, after surgery for my bartholin's labial mountain of a cyst, I was so afraid to go back (it was the most painful experience of my life) and ended up removing my own stitches myself. LUCKILY everything was ok, but it was really stupid on my part. I was also pretty obsessed with how my vulva would look after it all because it's one area I'm kinda vain about.

kari
05-16-2015, 01:18 AM
I finally got a pap smear. Fuck that shit! But now I know I don't have cervical cancer so I guess I have that going for me.

pensive_pilgrim
05-16-2015, 01:30 AM
I've been slathering my penis with cocoa butter-vitamin e lotion every day after showering hoping that maybe the next time I fuck someone I can achieve orgasm without resorting to extreme measures. I feel like it's looking smoother and shinier but maybe that's all in my head(lol).

stuck
05-16-2015, 01:31 AM
labia...removing my own stitches myself.

http://33.media.tumblr.com/8d76f8eefd0ff65caca800ea57371887/tumblr_mku5m5cA0p1snpc3lo1_500.gif

LordLatch
05-16-2015, 05:40 AM
^Everybody has done that.

attila_the_hunny
05-16-2015, 05:59 PM
It wasn't so bad. However, when they removed the packing after surgery it felt like they were pulling out my fallopian tubes.

stuck
05-16-2015, 06:13 PM
It wasn't so bad. However, when they removed the packing after surgery it felt like they were pulling out my fallopian tubes.

oof, i wonder if it kinda soldered itself to doz suga wallz :o

petrichor
05-18-2015, 01:47 AM
I finally got a pap smear. Fuck that shit! But now I know I don't have cervical cancer so I guess I have that going for me.

I'm going to the ob/gyn for the first time this week so they can poke and prod at my bits.

I hope everything's ok down there.

jigglypuff
05-18-2015, 01:52 AM
^ welcome fellow xxxx


I finally got a pap smear. Fuck that shit! But now I know I don't have cervical cancer so I guess I have that going for me.


I'm going to the ob/gyn for the first time this week so they can poke and prod at my bits.

I hope everything's ok down there.
gotta go get one again soon, but i'm dreading it. i expect the wait at the clinic to suck.

petrichor
05-18-2015, 01:57 AM
^ welcome fellow xxxx




gotta go get one again soon, but i'm dreading it. i expect the wait at the clinic to suck.

Thanks for the welcome! I'm dreading getting my cervix swabbed and having someone explore my nether region. I've been trying to console myself with the knowledge that they've seen countless vaginas and that mine will be just another vagina in a sea of undulant vaginas.

MuseedesBeauxArts
05-18-2015, 02:26 AM
Pro-tip: if you get a pap that includes HPV testing (and you've had a few paps but none abnormal, etc.), you can often prolong the times between testing.

ashi
05-18-2015, 02:46 AM
I have decided to re-write my post and overshare quite a bit less, because it would seem that I do not in fact love you all.

[SNIP]

Roger Mexico
05-18-2015, 03:24 AM
This thread reminded me of the lump on my balls (or rather one of them) which has been there for several years. Guess I hadn't really thought about it in a while.

I've never had it checked out, which is probably dumb, but since it hasn't noticeably changed in size or anything over that time, it's been there since before I impregnated someone, and it doesn't seem to cause any other problems apart from occasional hypersensitivity (to amounts of pressure too slight even to trigger the normal hypersensitive testicular pain response), it doesn't scream "major fucking problem" to me. It's been on my "things to look into if I ever end up with health insurance" list.

I feel like if it were an aggressively malignant tumor I'd be in very serious shit by now, although I really have no idea what the timeframe is for that. (The internet has been unhelpful with this question.)

Since I can't see it, my best guess is that it's a swollen portion of the vas deferens. It feels solid, and slightly harder than the testicular tissue. It hurts like a motherfucker if I squeeze it lightly--leading me to suspect that it's been brushed by something in the cases where I suddenly feel pain for little or no apparent reason. (E.g. failure to "manspread" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manspreading) can make this happen.) It seems to be located at the top of the left testicle, separated from it by maybe a millimeter or two. That ball hangs somewhat lower than the right one, but I don't know if that has anything to do with it.

LordLatch
05-18-2015, 04:06 AM
ashi your use of the word 'delightfully' in your gruesome recant is both disturbing and amusing.

Also sometime around the same age as my last genital narrative, I grew a nice scrotal lump/cyst thing I could not pop without excessive pain. It seemed to reside under too many layers of skin. I took a hot bath and sliced that sucker open with a tiger knife to facilitate the draining. I remember saying to myself something about it being my first self surgery. It healed nicely and was forgotten until said anecdote was needed for this post.

sandwitch
05-18-2015, 04:11 AM
Convenient that this thread was revived as today I noticed the return of my bart cyst. I've both been riding a bicycle regularly and have had a lot of activity in that area (also maybe I wanted to brag), so it's difficult to identify either as main culprit.

LordLatch
05-18-2015, 04:20 AM
Yeah, brag about the 'activity.'

Madrigal
05-18-2015, 04:52 AM
I'm probably the most negligent and the most paranoid person I know. Most negligent because I haven't had a pap done in ages, but most paranoid because I only ever use condoms and a guy has never come inside me.

The pap was so traumatic I'm terrified of going back. She was hurting me a lot and I started squirming, and she barked for me to stay still or the glass would shatter inside me. I started crying but she didn't seem to give a crap. I dunno if that was a normal procedure or what, but I'm never going to a female gynecologist again.

LordLatch
05-18-2015, 04:54 AM
I've heard female gyns are very rough.

ashi
05-18-2015, 04:55 AM
she barked for me to stay still or the glass would shatter inside me.

I think I just felt something inside me crawl deeper in to hide.



*curls into a ball*

Limes
05-18-2015, 05:35 AM
This thread isn't sexy at all.
Total chub killer.

LordLatch
05-18-2015, 05:46 AM
This thread isn't sexy at all.
Total chub killer.

http://www.b15u.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=51068&d=1375395958

jigglypuff
05-18-2015, 10:19 AM
my body decided to passive aggressively thank me for staying in bed all day due to a bad case of the SAD (it's overcast!) by giving me what's probably a UTI. so now it's 3 am & i'm up drinking big cups of water for any sort of relief as fast as possible. thank you back, body.

(this forum really needs an emoji equivalent to the crying-laughter one on phones.)

oxyjen
05-18-2015, 10:45 AM
my body decided to passive aggressively thank me for staying in bed all day due to a bad case of the SAD (it's overcast!) by giving me what's probably a UTI. so now it's 3 am & i'm up drinking big cups of water for any sort of relief as fast as possible. thank you back, body.

(this forum really needs an emoji equivalent to the crying-laughter one on phones.)

Ugggghhhh, sucky. Many years ago I had a problem with UTI's (my body did not like that particular boyfriend's bacterial profile)--OTC medication and cranberry capsule supplements help A LOT.

jigglypuff
05-18-2015, 10:53 AM
Ugggghhhh, sucky. Many years ago I had a problem with UTI's (my body did not like that particular boyfriend's bacterial profile)--OTC medication and cranberry capsule supplements help A LOT.
after four big cups my body feels a lot better :lol:

if this persists tomorrow i'll look into cranberry supplements. i've only used cranberry juice before and that worked ok

sandwitch
05-18-2015, 12:55 PM
The pap was so traumatic I'm terrified of going back. She was hurting me a lot and I started squirming, and she barked for me to stay still or the glass would shatter inside me. I started crying but she didn't seem to give a crap. I dunno if that was a normal procedure or what, but I'm never going to a female gynecologist again.

That is absolutely horrifying. Is there much consideration for "bedside manners" in Argetinian healthcare?

The first time I got a pap, the doctor was wonderful. She asked me questions about traveling, and when shit felt weird I rambled about all the places where I would prefer to be. The only male doctor I've had was not a very gracious man- maybe it would be different with a dedicated gyno rather than a generalist.

jigglypuff
05-20-2015, 08:04 PM
after four big cups my body feels a lot better :lol:

if this persists tomorrow i'll look into cranberry supplements. i've only used cranberry juice before and that worked ok
this cleared up really fast, it's a record. i think it's cuz i caught it early and stayed up and drowned my body in water instead of trying to sleep off the pain. yay

by the big pee the morning after, it was already on its way out :D

MuseedesBeauxArts
05-21-2015, 05:52 AM
The pap was so traumatic I'm terrified of going back. She was hurting me a lot and I started squirming, and she barked for me to stay still or the glass would shatter inside me. I started crying but she didn't seem to give a crap. I dunno if that was a normal procedure or what, but I'm never going to a female gynecologist again.


I've heard female gyns are very rough.

Oh, good GOD. Maddy, this is horrible. I'd generally rather go to a female gyn than a male, but going to a sadist of either gender is never a good idea. And what the fuck is up with glass speculums?!

Madrigal
05-21-2015, 10:07 PM
That is absolutely horrifying. Is there much consideration for "bedside manners" in Argetinian healthcare?



Oh, good GOD. Maddy, this is horrible. I'd generally rather go to a female gyn than a male, but going to a sadist of either gender is never a good idea. And what the fuck is up with glass speculums?!

It felt like she was twisting something inside of me, I have no fucking clue whether it was supposed to feel that way, but I'm probably not going back unless I see something weird or I want to go on birth control (and that would involve dating someone I can trust, fat chance).

Roger Mexico
05-21-2015, 11:11 PM
This thread isn't sexy at all.
Total chub killer.

I recently heard a "friend of a friend" sort of story (actually friend relating story told by her mother, who worked in an emergency room) about a guy coming with some kind of glass beverage-stirring stick broken off inside of his dick.

Apparently he'd gotten curious about what it would feel like to stuff powdered cocaine up inside his own urethra.

EDIT: I used to know a guy who was rumored (not like I ever asked to watch) to have a taste for injecting liquified cocaine into the flesh of his penis with a syringe, but somehow this story manages to beat that one.

MuseedesBeauxArts
05-22-2015, 12:31 AM
...somehow this story manages to beat that one.

If we're trying to win something, how about someone wanting to keep her Trichomonads because her boyfriend loved the flavor?

pensive_pilgrim
05-22-2015, 01:11 AM
EDIT: I used to know a guy who was rumored (not like I ever asked to watch) to have a taste for injecting liquified cocaine into the flesh of his penis with a syringe, but somehow this story manages to beat that one.

This is one of those things I've heard repeatedly that always seems to start with somebody not into junk walking in on somebody shooting up in their inner thigh, which is a good place to shoot if you're concerned about visible track marks and/or you've fucked up your other good places to inject. I can't imagine why anybody would want to shoot right into their dick since it doesn't seem like it would circulate very well and would probably just make your cock numb, but I can't say for sure since I haven't done it either.

Perdix
05-22-2015, 01:26 AM
This is one of those things I've heard repeatedly that always seems to start with somebody not into junk walking in on somebody shooting up in their inner thigh, which is a good place to shoot if you're concerned about visible track marks and/or you've fucked up your other good places to inject. I can't imagine why anybody would want to shoot right into their dick since it doesn't seem like it would circulate very well and would probably just make your cock numb, but I can't say for sure since I haven't done it either.

It would eventually make it to your BBB, but it would be stupid, risky and done purely out of novelty IMO.

@Madrigal (http://forums.intpcomplex.com/member.php?u=14), at first, I didn't think a company manufacture such an item, until I googled "glass speculum"... that experience sounds horrid.

Anyways, I have nothing to contribute to this thread... my genitals are fine.

LordLatch
05-22-2015, 03:06 AM
..my genitals are fine.

How can you be certain you have the normal number of them?

kari
05-22-2015, 03:16 AM
Is it normal if one of my balls is bigger than the other three?

Perdix
05-22-2015, 03:26 AM
How can you be certain you have the normal number of them?

I have high resolution CT scans (most: mid thigh to collar bone) of my entire body, and the cracked medical imaging software to view myself. It's unbelievably cool/comforting to see cross sections that ensure I'm not abnormal physiologically. Intravenous Iodine feels amazing by the way.

LordLatch
05-22-2015, 04:11 AM
Is it normal if one of my balls is bigger than the other three?
Only after a memorable impact.


I have high resolution CT scans (most: mid thigh to collar bone) of my entire body, and the cracked medical imaging software to view myself. It's unbelievably cool/comforting to see cross sections that ensure I'm not abnormal physiologically. Intravenous Iodine feels amazing by the way.

You should print out a photo album and use it to bore house guests as you talk loudly about your parts and point them out excitedly with a riding crop.

Limes
05-22-2015, 04:18 AM
I have high resolution CT scans (most: mid thigh to collar bone) of my entire body, and the cracked medical imaging software to view myself. It's unbelievably cool/comforting to see cross sections that ensure I'm not abnormal physiologically. Intravenous Iodine feels amazing by the way.

Medical facilities: If you pull a CT scan image out of the air, or off the visitor's network, it freaks them out. They be like: oh noes, my siemens!
HIPAAAAA! *shakes fist*

Also, one funny office scene when I worked in Miami, a woman in our (IT) dept had a transverse scan of her mid section and was showing everyone, when I overheard one of the guys say (pointing) "hey vicky, is that your vagina?" -still makes me laugh to this day.

BIOTCH
05-23-2015, 12:49 AM
never been to a gyno and never will, a strangers junk testing my junk aint for me lol. a non-standard american diet, raw cod liver oil and high quality probiotics can help many symptoms. your body is built to withstand invaders with the right tools

Limes
05-23-2015, 09:46 AM
http://writtenpolicy.com/oyster.jpg

Roger Mexico
05-23-2015, 08:38 PM
This is one of those things I've heard repeatedly that always seems to start with somebody not into junk walking in on somebody shooting up in their inner thigh, which is a good place to shoot if you're concerned about visible track marks and/or you've fucked up your other good places to inject. I can't imagine why anybody would want to shoot right into their dick since it doesn't seem like it would circulate very well and would probably just make your cock numb, but I can't say for sure since I haven't done it either.

Yeah, you may be right.

With long-term coke users specifically, though, I have seen a certain penchant for curiosity about alternate dosage sites and methods--possibly because it does have localized effects in addition to CNS effects, unlike many other drugs--although it might just be a sort of psychological fetish. Genitals seem like a popular subject of this fixation. I had a friend for a while who suffered from a certain lack of a TMI filter about sharing intimate details of his private life with anyone he was talking to, and things like "I'm going to go home and see if my girlfriend wants to come over and snort coke off of my dick" were such a common utterance that they became something people made fun of him for when he wasn't around.

I can say from a small number of personal experiences that even dosage through the normal routes (I only ever snorted or smoked it) seems to allow for the maintenance of an erection while still preventing or delaying orgasm, and I have heard some folklore about ostensibly epic marathon sex sessions that involve direct topical application of cocaine to the penis. I guess if you're looking to step your game up with that sort of thing, stuffing it up your urethra or injecting is a logical extension of the basic principle.

Never tried it myself, so maybe that's bullshit, but I wouldn't put it past lots of people to give it a shot. (Ooooh, I punned on accident.)