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  1. #1
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Eating Alone

    Quote Originally Posted by prometheus View Post
    I was thinking "Why would she go out alone if she has a bf?" until I read your update; also, how were you supposed to handle this?

    --

    I don't know what the fuck to do with my life.
    Oh come on. Dining alone is one of life's pleasures. I love sitting at a restaurant alone, especially if I have something to read or I'm by a window.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hephaestus View Post
    Heh. We've been here years now.

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    Mens bona regnum possidet ferrus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madrigal View Post
    Oh come on. Dining alone is one of life's pleasures. I love sitting at a restaurant alone, especially if I have something to read or I'm by a window.
    Heh. I would love it but it is really a social faux pas around where I live being somewhat provincial. In a big city I guess it is less of an issue.
    Die Logik ist keine Lehre, sondern ein Spiegelbild der Welt. Die Logik ist transcendental. - Wittgenstein

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    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ferrus View Post
    Heh. I would love it but it is really a social faux pas around where I live being somewhat provincial. In a big city I guess it is less of an issue.
    It seems like middle-aged and older people here do it all the time, as well as younger people who read/study/work while eating. I go to some restaurants where certain men are practically regulars, just sitting there eating their pasta with meat and wine. They're not sophisticated or anything, they just don't give a crap, they like the food. And they're friends with the staff.

    The first time I heard there was something strange about eating alone was in the US last year. I guess it's a thing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hephaestus View Post
    Heh. We've been here years now.

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    Mens bona regnum possidet ferrus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madrigal View Post
    They're not sophisticated or anything, they just don't give a crap, they like the food. And they're friends with the staff.
    Oh yeah. I know the type. But they are usually middle aged or older and go to downmarket Indian and Chinese places here.
    Die Logik ist keine Lehre, sondern ein Spiegelbild der Welt. Die Logik ist transcendental. - Wittgenstein

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    <3 gator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madrigal View Post
    It seems like middle-aged and older people here do it all the time, as well as younger people who read/study/work while eating. I go to some restaurants where certain men are practically regulars, just sitting there eating their pasta with meat and wine. They're not sophisticated or anything, they just don't give a crap, they like the food. And they're friends with the staff.

    The first time I heard there was something strange about eating alone was in the US last year. I guess it's a thing.
    I wish I could enjoy eating alone. I always feel awkward, rushed and judged when I do. Not sure if that's me or if it's a cultural thing, or both.

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    Quote Originally Posted by gator View Post
    I wish I could enjoy eating alone. I always feel awkward, rushed and judged when I do. Not sure if that's me or if it's a cultural thing, or both.
    I'm glad smartphones and tablets are paving a path in society for people to be out in public by themselves and not be perceived as a sex offender, so long as they're tuning out the world and transfixed on a small LED screen.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by gator View Post
    I wish I could enjoy eating alone. I always feel awkward, rushed and judged when I do. Not sure if that's me or if it's a cultural thing, or both.
    I'm the same way. My thought train is comical when eating alone:

    *Ok, where do I put my eyes? Hmmm.. they have interesting photos on the wall, that one's cool, wonder when it was taken? Oh, look the waitress is bringing my foo.. shit, made eye contact, that's not good.. she'll think I'm interested or creepy.. uh.. photos.. looking at photos... ok, I've seen all the photos. Hmm.. the scratches in the table are interesting. Wonder what caused each one, how many people sat at this table? Wait.. I think those people are watching me.. shit, now I'm watching them.. menu.. menu is cool.... Eat and RUN.. just EAT and RUUUUN.
    Quote Originally Posted by mara View Post
    my crime is that i disrupted the echo chamber

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    Quote Originally Posted by gator View Post
    I wish I could enjoy eating alone. I always feel awkward, rushed and judged when I do. Not sure if that's me or if it's a cultural thing, or both.
    Quote Originally Posted by stigmatica View Post
    I'm the same way. My thought train is comical when eating alone:

    *Ok, where do I put my eyes? Hmmm.. they have interesting photos on the wall, that one's cool, wonder when it was taken? Oh, look the waitress is bringing my foo.. shit, made eye contact, that's not good.. she'll think I'm interested or creepy.. uh.. photos.. looking at photos... ok, I've seen all the photos. Hmm.. the scratches in the table are interesting. Wonder what caused each one, how many people sat at this table? Wait.. I think those people are watching me.. shit, now I'm watching them.. menu.. menu is cool.... Eat and RUN.. just EAT and RUUUUN.
    i'm so glad i don't care. like Madrigal, i enjoy bringing a book and shutting out the world, but you have to find an appropriate place and time. like obviously you wouldn't do that in a huge place during the dinner rush & people are coming in in parties of 10. when i'm done with the food i'll leave if other people are waiting. idk how people get by without occasionally eating by themselves in public. people are such a hassle, lol.

    when i worked at a restaurant the people who came in alone, kept to themselves and didn't leave behind a huge mess were my favorite customers...
    Cut out all these exclamation points. An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke.

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    Quote Originally Posted by prometheus View Post
    I was thinking "Why would she go out alone if she has a bf?" until I read your update; also, how were you supposed to handle this?
    if you go out alone you can just eat and go home. going out with someone means you're making it a night or just coming home later which is not good when you've got something else to do. i'm RESP onSIble

    it was good, though... i forgot what happened. lol wtf
    Cut out all these exclamation points. An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke.

  10. #10
    Your Huckleberry lethe's Avatar
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    I've been purposely practicing eating out alone now and again for about year.

    I, too, found it painfully awkward and uncomfortable. Using the phone works but I'm trying to avoid it as if it defeated the purpose for me.

    I've had the most success going to restaurants that have a bar and sitting at the actual bar. Maybe it's because I'm comfortable in the dynamics of that area from working in bars before, or because I've been comfortable drinking in a bar alone (just not eating, lol!) or because the bar is like "the singles pit" of a restaurant. It's where you stick those without lab partners...

    I like sitting at the bar - I'm not facing an empty seat, I'm not taking a table meant for more people, there is no time crunch/it's safe to linger, the bartender will chat if they have the time and you are both interested, otherwise it's safe to just watch them work. It's less awkward to ask for something and the bartender can check on you more casually. And for some reason I'm more comfortable bringing a book or kindle into a bar than a restaurant.

    I get the "table fiddles" even when I'm at the restaurant with others. I get around it by making little origami out of my paper napkin or playing a simple pen/paper game if someone else is willing.
    Don't remember changing this.

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