Me: Did you miss meeee? I missed youuuu!
Cat:
Me: I've loved you your entire life!
Cat:
Me: Is it possible to love you more than I do?
Cat:
Me: Is it even humanly possible?
Cat:
Me: Actually I had no choice. Nobody can stand you except me.
Cat:
Me: Ugh! Why don't you look at me!
Cat:
Me: Fine, just look at yourself. Fucking shrimp. You're never going to grow.
Cat:
Me: And we're different species, get that through your head.
Cat:
Me: Hey. Do you know what's in this can?
Cat:
Fucking jerk.
Originally Posted by Hephaestus
I know what the problem is. You have a cat not a dog.
-Conversation with my cat when I get home from work-
Cat: Meooww
Me: Hi Kitty!
Cat: Meowww
Me: Whaaaa?!
Cat: Meow
Me: Wow, Kitty. Thats crazy.
Cat: Meooww
Me: I know. I can't even believe that.
She is always hungry or bored when I get home. She either wants to eat or go outside or both.
Conversations with dogs usually consist of variations on "Hey pup!", "What do you want?", "Go get it.", "Bang", "Roll over" "Outside?" "Come here", "Sit", and "Hungry?". Now that I think of it, Bartender is right. Cats are not good conversationalists.
Creativity is the residue of time wasted. ~ Albert Einstein
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This has gotten pretty out of hand in our house.
Me: Good mewning, burrra
Maggie: Abrasive meow
Me: C'mere glump
Maggie: Abrasive meow
Me: Ah fuck off then <3
Glimpses do ye seem to see of that mortally intolerable truth; that all deep, earnest thinking is but the intrepid effort of the soul to keep the open independence of her sea; while the wildest winds of heaven and earth conspire to cast her on the treacherous, slavish shore?
prudence: bbbbbbbbb rrrrrggghh
me (on phone): prudence, say something! *brings phone to the side of her head*
prudence: ...
me: say something!
prudence: .....
WORKJIGGLYPLAY
HARDxBUTTxHARD
Haaaaaaay jack HI
[looks at me]
teddy bear
teddy
square
caramel bear!
[licks paws]
Is he a good boy of all boys in the world
to mommy?
Because I've heard that he is a friend
who helps
and a little guy who cares!
[snorts]
HE'S A SPECIAL FUCKING BOY
[gets up and comes over]
HE'S DADDY'S LITTLE COYOTE GUY
CARE BEAR
SQUARE BEAR
[snorts and runs around in circles]
we're insufferable
Ha, you deserve each other.Me: Actually I had no choice. Nobody can stand you except me.
Cat:
Your gardening sucks and your avocados ain't fruitin'. -- Sappho the Maestro
LOL. Touchée.
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