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Thread: Your dream last night in one sentence

  1. #11
    Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    David Hasselhoff molested me.

  2. #12
    ..you don't know me LordLatch's Avatar
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    Wow- did he do it in German?

  3. #13
    Meae Musae Servus Hephaestus's Avatar
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    Something made me laugh--a grand one liner incorporating all the classics of comedy: death, death, pain, anger, death, implied pain, and word play--at which point I came nearly awake (dreaming I was almost awake) and buzzing with power and pleasure and the pleasure of power: the power to feel pleasure?
    Most of time, when people ask why something terrible happened, they don't realize they are looking for someone to blame.

    --Meditations on Uncertainty Vol ξ(x)

  4. #14
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    A woman from the 20s was buying a new dress (similar to the one on the left shown here, except blue, and not lace), but the dress "broke", which somehow involved egg yolks breaking and running over the bottom part of the dress.

  5. #15
    Member Aurast's Avatar
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    I was using a very nasty bathroom in which water was dripping on my head and the sinks were too small to cram my hands in without touching the sides and faucet and the stream of water had the diameter of a needle.

  6. #16
    No Thank You Blorg's Avatar
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    I waited in a deserted and unlit McDonalds for the car salesman to locate the mysteriously-vanished car I wanted to buy.

  7. #17
    Meae Musae Servus Hephaestus's Avatar
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    I got a bag of Taco Bell for dinner; when I got home, I discovered that there was a cup of coffee in the bag--this was a surprise to me as I didn't know what I'd ordered came with coffee, but my surprise quickly morphed into outrage because the coffee had been placed in the bag upside down, and it was clear from the way it was wedged in there that it hadn't just tipped over, it had been deliberately placed in there upside down with a wad of napkins in the lid to slow the rate of seepage so that I would be unlikely to discover it until I got home--I returned to my vehicle seething and drove back; before heading in, I fueled up across the street--it was starting to snow; as I was fueling that I discovered I'd left the bag of ruined food and sodden illegible receipt at home; I decided I didn't give a shit--unless they were doing this to everyone, they would certainly remember me and if they didn't have acceptable answers and a double refund for me, I was gonna turn that little piece of shit taco shop into Nakatomi Plaza (Yippee-Kai-Yay, Motherfucker).
    Most of time, when people ask why something terrible happened, they don't realize they are looking for someone to blame.

    --Meditations on Uncertainty Vol ξ(x)

  8. #18
    Member MoneyJungle's Avatar
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    Some waiter opened his shirt and shoved his huge nipple in my face when I accused him of skipping me in the order-taking rotation.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Starjots's Avatar
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    Waking up thinking 'Oh shit!' at 3:30 pm for the second day of my new job.

  10. #20
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    A small, wooden, magic box containing two sleeping women killed them both, sealed us within a house, and started a raging fire that we could not escape from.

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