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Thread: Describe your fucked up relationship with food

  1. #1
    creator kali's Avatar
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    Describe your fucked up relationship with food

    So what is it? Do you eat too much? Too little? Eat too fast? Too slow? Eat too frequently? Forget meals occasionally? Do you eat too much junk? Are you orthorexic? Do you only eat instant noodles? Do you obsess over calories? Do you only eat toast to save money? Do you eat to cope with your emotions!? Are you allergic to everything? Do you think white chocolate is real chocolate?

    Describe to us your fucked up relationship with food.
    "I fucking hate the cold!" - Wim Hof

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  2. #2
    Mens bona regnum possidet ferrus's Avatar
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    I eat too much when stressed and/or depressed.

    I often spend far too much on food and then have to go a week or two living off beans. This happened at university a lot.
    Die Logik ist keine Lehre, sondern ein Spiegelbild der Welt. Die Logik ist transcendental. - Wittgenstein

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    I go from cooking Gordon-Ramsay-style three course dinners (when I have little work to do) to consuming almost nothing but a bare minimum of soda bread and tremendous quantities of Russian black tea for days (when I have lots of work to do). Moreover I annoy my friends with rotative fads – preparing nothing but Japanese food three times a day for a year, then nothing but Italian cuisine, then nothing but Austrian dishes, etc. When I acquire a new cooking skill, like making sauces or certain doughs from scratch, I suddenly begin talking about their ready-made counterparts (and the people who enjoy them) with utter contempt.

    Yes, it's a miracle that I still have friends.

  4. #4
    Scala Mountains Resonance's Avatar
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    In one sentence? "Oh yeah, I should probably eat something today."

    My appetite vanishes at the slightest provocation. When I do eat, my tummy gets upset almost at random. That might be linked to emotions, but I don't know. It also happens with most kinds of chips (crisps) and salad dressings.

    I don't hate cooking, but it's too much effort for just one meal. If I can frame it as an experiment or a togetherness-activity, then it becomes enjoyable.

    I do eat a lot of instant noodles just because they are cheap and easy to prepare, but I always put veggies and eggs in them to 'healthy' it up - pretty much the same as a rice bowl.
    Empty your mind. Be formless. Shapeless. Like water. Water can flow, or it can crash. Be water, my friend.

  5. #5
    Pull the strings! Architect's Avatar
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    Oooh, good one. I'm entirely fucked up when it comes to food.

    My mother was of German descent and believed normality was eating lots of greasy, meaty foods. I was born an ascetic; food and defecation disgusted me. I wanted clean foods, not the disgusting stuff I was getting. I remember that my mind felt clearest after all the food had cleared out, I was at the top of my game on an empty stomach. But my mother was continually hounding me to eat more. one meal they had liver and onions (it was the 70's). If you've never smelled liver and onions ... it was worse than repellent. I got sent to my room without dinner which was a gift. But my stupid Sensor family took pity on me and sent my sister up with a plate of the crap which smelled up my room, I wanted to kill her.

    Even as an adult my mother would hound me over the stupid shit making food. On my birthday she wanted to make a cake. My response was "No that's OK" to which she got disgusted. So fine, she could make a stupid cake, which was some horrible box mix cake. I tried a piece, it made me sick.

    So the result of all this is that I have a very efficient metabolism. I'm 6' 4" and only need less than 1800 calories. But due to her I've got a food complex. There's some programming in my brain to eat more, even when I'm full I'll be thinking I should eat more. So I eat too much really. Fortunately I've got a diet where I can eat as much as I want without gaining weight, it just fills me up.

    Fuck food, I hate foodies and pictures of food. It's just expensive shit.

  6. #6
    Mens bona regnum possidet ferrus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Architect View Post
    Oooh, good one. I'm entirely fucked up when it comes to food.

    My mother was of German descent and believed normality was eating lots of greasy, meaty foods. I was born an ascetic; food and defecation disgusted me. I wanted clean foods, not the disgusting stuff I was getting. I remember that my mind felt clearest after all the food had cleared out, I was at the top of my game on an empty stomach. But my mother was continually hounding me to eat more. one meal they had liver and onions (it was the 70's). If you've never smelled liver and onions ... it was worse than repellent. I got sent to my room without dinner which was a gift. But my stupid Sensor family took pity on me and sent my sister up with a plate of the crap which smelled up my room, I wanted to kill her.

    Even as an adult my mother would hound me over the stupid shit making food. On my birthday she wanted to make a cake. My response was "No that's OK" to which she got disgusted. So fine, she could make a stupid cake, which was some horrible box mix cake. I tried a piece, it made me sick.

    So the result of all this is that I have a very efficient metabolism. I'm 6' 4" and only need less than 1800 calories. But due to her I've got a food complex. There's some programming in my brain to eat more, even when I'm full I'll be thinking I should eat more. So I eat too much really. Fortunately I've got a diet where I can eat as much as I want without gaining weight, it just fills me up.

    Fuck food, I hate foodies and pictures of food. It's just expensive shit.
    I think you're in the lead right now.

    For what it is worth - the earthy with a slight tinge of the metallic taste of liver and onions is one of my favourites.
    Last edited by ferrus; 04-17-2015 at 12:40 PM.
    Die Logik ist keine Lehre, sondern ein Spiegelbild der Welt. Die Logik ist transcendental. - Wittgenstein

  7. #7
    Now we know... Asteroids Champion ACow's Avatar
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    I like food a little too much. Its my vice/luxury.

    But I can get by on 1 large meal a day if someone isn't keeping track of time for me, cause I won't get off my arse and get it.

  8. #8
    I first read this as food as a metaphor for bad relationships...

    Anyway in the conventional sense I'm the world's worst vegetarian. I hate vegetables. I mean I can stand them if most of the natural flavor is smothered in sauce or cooked away but raw? Yuck. I do love potatoes though.

    Also I don't like cooking so I eat most meals out.

  9. #9
    Merry Christmas Blorg's Avatar
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    I've gotten better. I approximate in my head, but I don't carefully note every calorie that enters my body anymore, and I only allow myself to check my weight once a month. My body still yo yo diets on own, but not for extended periods of time, and not as severely as before, when I purposefully starved myself (and then went through binging spells).

    I'm going through a spell of starvation right now, which is financially convenient at least.
    "Better not to feel too much until the crisis ends—and if it never ends, at least we’ll have suffered a little less, developed a useful dullness...The constant—and very real—fear of being hurt, the fear of death, of intolerable loss, or even of “mere” humiliation, leads each of us, the citizens and prisoners of the conflict, to dampen our own vitality, our emotional and intellectual range, and to cloak ourselves in more and more protective layers until we suffocate." - Toni Morrison

  10. #10
    Political Animal ☭ Ⓐ Animals's Avatar
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    Always hungry always eating. I try to convonce myself i'm on a permanent bulk. Starting next week i'll stop overeating, wanna get shredded to the socks bro.

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