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Thread: Welcome to the Town Amusement Park!

  1. #1
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Welcome to the Town Amusement Park!

    Every town has gotta have one, and you found it. You're new to this town, and you've heard stories.

    You're standing at the amusement park gates right now. What time is it? You look inside. How do you feel about it?

    You venture in and you see a Ferris wheel. That sounds like a good first ride, because you'll get a view of the park and town at the same time. You hop on, and when when you get to the highest point, the ride stops for a moment. You contemplate the view. Suddenly, someone down in the amusement park catches your eye. You strain to see. Can you see them well? Describe what you can about that person and what they're doing.

    Next, the roller coaster. You buy a ticket, but when you get to the trains, you realize you're the only one there. The amusement park staff is sitting there drinking mate and playing solitaire. He looks up, surprised to see you. You ask if the ride is working. "Yes, of course it's working. Why else would I be here?" You ask why nobody is taking the ride. What does he reply? Do you get on?

    Next stop, bumper cars! So this is where everyone is! You quickly find a free car and jump in. A song begins to play. Which song is it? Do you enjoy yourself?

    After the bumper cars, you look for something else to do. You see a shooting game, for prizes. A long rifle is placed in your hand. You look at the animals you need to shoot down. It is always the same animal. Which animal is it?

    After the game, you walk around wondering what to do next. A little old man with very dark eyes is selling candied apples. His eyes begin to shine when he sees you approach. "I don't think you've ever tried any like these before." What do you do?

    You're almost done with this place now, you've been here a while. But before you turn to leave, you see it. The ghost train. You scrutinize the entrance. "I see you you've found our main attraction," a man tells you, coming out of apparently nowhere. "New to this town, huh?" He extends his hand towards a tiny train. "Well, you couldn't possibly leave without riding the ghost train." His face breaks into a toothy grin. You think about it. Yes, you will ride that ghost train. But first, you check your backpack for something. What are you looking for?

    You get on the ghost train and you're soon swallowed up by darkness. You're transported deep inside, turning brusquely right and left. And then the train stops. What happens next?

    *******

    Thank you for visiting the Town Amusement Park. Hope to see you back soon!

  2. #2
    New Member Etherealsage's Avatar
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    It looks like a forest. /obligatory

    Okay, that's all the time I had until tonight.

  3. #3
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Etherealsage View Post
    It looks like a forest. /obligatory

    Okay, that's all the time I had until tonight.
    I'll tell you publicly whether I think you're mafia or a townie, judging by your answers. But for that, I will need to get replies. Don't worry if you're a townie, I've minimized the possibility of errors on my part by adding many options. I'll err on the side of caution. And don't worry if you're mafia. You can always say that a game like this isn't exactly solid evidence to go by.

  4. #4
    Amen P-O's Avatar
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    I don't like the idea of your supposed authority on interpretation. I won't be overly influenced by what you decide, but I think there are some townies who would be. It's a bs form of evidence that, if you were mafia, could give you a lot of influence over the vote.
    Violence is never the right answer, unless used against heathens and monsters.

  5. #5
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by P-O View Post
    I don't like the idea of your supposed authority on interpretation. I won't be overly influenced by what you decide, but I think there are some townies who would be. It's a bs form of evidence that, if you were mafia, could give you a lot of influence over the vote.
    If you don't want this to be any fun, I'll keep the interpretations to myself - or just rep them to you.

  6. #6
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    On second thought, I'm not repping them to you. If you're mafia, and I tell you that you're mafia, you might want to kill me, and nobody will know why.

    Just trying to make this game fun here. I will post the interpretations. I won't be able to manipulate the interpretation because I'm obviously going to explain the reasoning, which btw is very simple and the same for everyone. If that reasoning sounds like bullshit, be my guest and just say so.

  7. #7
    Amen P-O's Avatar
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    fair enough
    Violence is never the right answer, unless used against heathens and monsters.

  8. #8
    Tawaci ki a Gnaska ki Osito Polar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madrigal View Post
    Every town has gotta have one, and you found it. You're new to this town, and you've heard stories.

    You're standing at the amusement park gates right now. What time is it? You look inside. How do you feel about it?
    It's 7:18 AM and I've just finished with my morning calisthenics outside the headquarters of the Ministry of Truth with the other members of the Party. I glance at the amusement park and the smiling visage of our Great Leader beams down on me. I feel a mixture of humility in his august presence and a worry that the cameras installed in his eyeglasses will detect traces of disloyalty in my posture.

    You venture in and you see a Ferris wheel. That sounds like a good first ride, because you'll get a view of the park and town at the same time. You hop on, and when when you get to the highest point, the ride stops for a moment. You contemplate the view. Suddenly, someone down in the amusement park catches your eye. You strain to see. Can you see them well? Describe what you can about that person and what they're doing.
    As I look down, I see Polemarch working in the park's concession stand. He is wearing a uniform and a paper hat. As I watch, chobani approaches his food stall. They have a brief exchange or words, and he gives her a patriotic white and blue snowcone.

    Next, the roller coaster. You buy a ticket, but when you get to the trains, you realize you're the only one there. The amusement park staff is sitting there drinking mate and playing solitaire. He looks up, surprised to see you. You ask if the ride is working. "Yes, of course it's working. Why else would I be here?" You ask why nobody is taking the ride. What does he reply? Do you get on?
    As I get close to the man busily not operating the roller coaster, I notice that he positively reeks of patchouli oil and high-grade marijuana. His eyes are red and glassy and he wears a dopey smile. I salute his attention to his important duties to the State of pretending to work.

    Next stop, bumper cars! So this is where everyone is! You quickly find a free car and jump in. A song begins to play. Which song is it? Do you enjoy yourself?
    The song is "Hasta Siempre Comandante" and while it's playing everyone enjoys themselves because to do otherwise would risk being accused of treason.

    After the bumper cars, you look for something else to do. You see a shooting game, for prizes. A long rifle is placed in your hand. You look at the animals you need to shoot down. It is always the same animal. Which animal is it?
    The animals are all capitalist swine from our enemy state of Oceania. We have always been at war with Oceania.

    After the game, you walk around wondering what to do next. A little old man with very dark eyes is selling candied apples. His eyes begin to shine when he sees you approach. "I don't think you've ever tried any like these before." What do you do?
    I shy away from the old man because I fear anything that is new. I am suspicious of him and his apples. The man is likely either a member of the Party's Loyalty Commission who is attempting to entrap me or he could be an enemy of the state. Either way I decide not to speak to him or take candy from him.

    You're almost done with this place now, you've been here a while. But before you turn to leave, you see it. The ghost train. You scrutinize the entrance. "I see you you've found our main attraction," a man tells you, coming out of apparently nowhere. "New to this town, huh?" He extends his hand towards a tiny train. "Well, you couldn't possibly leave without riding the ghost train." His face breaks into a toothy grin. You think about it. Yes, you will ride that ghost train. But first, you check your backpack for something. What are you looking for?
    I search for a flask of brandy. I twist off its cap and take a swig. I dislike this man and his stupid fucking ghost train but it looks like I have to ride it anyway.

    You get on the ghost train and you're soon swallowed up by darkness. You're transported deep inside, turning brusquely right and left. And then the train stops. What happens next?
    An animatronic display lights up and the Great Leader and his lieutenants perform a pantomime of their struggle to win our independence from the colonial forces of Eurasia. More lights come up behind the robots and actors emerge from the set dressing to perform mock combat behind them. Plumes of colored smoke come up from the stage and as our heroic forces defeat the Eurasians, music swells and my train jerks into motion again ultimately depositing me outside in the parking lot.

    My duties fulfilled, I walk back to work.
    "I don't have psychological problems." --Madrigal

    "When you write about shooting Polemarch in the head, that's more like a first-person view, like you're there looking down the sight of the gun." --Utisz

    David Wong, regarding Chicago
    Six centuries ago, the pre-Colombian natives who settled here named this region with a word which in their language means "the Mouth of Shadow". Later, the Iroquois who showed up and inexplicably slaughtered every man, woman and child renamed it "Seriously, Fuck that Place". When French explorer Jacques Marquette passed through the area he marked his map with a drawing of a brownish blob emerging from between the Devil's buttocks.

  9. #9
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Oso, you got 6/8 in favor of you being a townie. I'll explain my reasoning after more replies.

    You're either a townie or you know how I interpret these things. After all, you've hosted this game mamny times.

  10. #10
    non-canonical Light Leak's Avatar
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    You're standing at the amusement park gates right now. What time is it? You look inside. How do you feel about it?
    It's morning. I want to make sure I have time to try everything out. There doesn't seem to be much people here yet. I'm happy because that means shorter lines for me.

    You venture in and you see a Ferris wheel. That sounds like a good first ride, because you'll get a view of the park and town at the same time. You hop on, and when when you get to the highest point, the ride stops for a moment. You contemplate the view. Suddenly, someone down in the amusement park catches your eye. You strain to see. Can you see them well? Describe what you can about that person and what they're doing.
    It's a guy that looks kind of like a polar bear. He's waving a flag of some sort. As the Ferris wheel gets closer to the ground I notice that it's Osito Polar. That's not a flag he's waving. It's a pair of tighty whities on a stick.

    Next, the roller coaster. You buy a ticket, but when you get to the trains, you realize you're the only one there. The amusement park staff is sitting there drinking mate and playing solitaire. He looks up, surprised to see you. You ask if the ride is working. "Yes, of course it's working. Why else would I be here?" You ask why nobody is taking the ride. What does he reply? Do you get on?
    He tells me that everyone is going to the new amusement park a few towns over. They have newer roller coasters with the latest technology. The roller coaster here is one of the old wooden ones. I prefer wooden coasters anyways so I get on. I ask if I can go around twice since no one else is here. He says "Why not?"

    Next stop, bumper cars! So this is where everyone is! You quickly find a free car and jump in. A song begins to play. Which song is it? Do you enjoy yourself?
    It's Queen's Another one Bites the Dust. It's on a loop. I can't focus on anything except how much I hate that song. I can't wait for this ride to stop.

    After the bumper cars, you look for something else to do. You see a shooting game, for prizes. A long rifle is placed in your hand. You look at the animals you need to shoot down. It is always the same animal. Which animal is it?
    Dogs. More specifically, it's that laughing dog from duck hunt. I'm going to enjoy this game.

    After the game, you walk around wondering what to do next. A little old man with very dark eyes is selling candied apples. His eyes begin to shine when he sees you approach. "I don't think you've ever tried any like these before." What do you do?
    I try one. It tastes like a normal candied apple to me.

    You're almost done with this place now, you've been here a while. But before you turn to leave, you see it. The ghost train. You scrutinize the entrance. "I see you you've found our main attraction," a man tells you, coming out of apparently nowhere. "New to this town, huh?" He extends his hand towards a tiny train. "Well, you couldn't possibly leave without riding the ghost train." His face breaks into a toothy grin. You think about it. Yes, you will ride that ghost train. But first, you check your backpack for something. What are you looking for?
    My camera. I want a photo of this ghost train.

    You get on the ghost train and you're soon swallowed up by darkness. You're transported deep inside, turning brusquely right and left. And then the train stops. What happens next?
    I get stuck watching some animatronic barber shop quartet that looks like it wants to kill me. I feel like I've seen this somewhere before. Oh yeah. It was in that SNL skit.

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