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Thread: Reconciling Myself to Being an INTP Woman

  1. #1
    Member Garbage_Doll's Avatar
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    Reconciling Myself to Being an INTP Woman

    Hi! I have been researching typology for well over a decade as something of of a lesire pursuit (I am well aware it is more philosophy than scientific). FYI, I take types to be more about ego, or a general mentality one is always operating through, not literal thought processes, although I see the connection between it all.

    As a teen I tested clearly as INTP, and I admit it sounded like me, except NOT. It didn't suit me because it sounded like this cold sci-fi nerd, which I am not. I have always been more of an arty, creative person in terms of personal interests; although I did very well in all subjets in school, except PE. As an adult, I am drawn to psychospiritual matters. But the biggest objection I had was to how miserable it may INTPs sound. It hit on all the criticisms I had received growing up.

    I didn't even consider INFP because it was made to sound like a silly, saccharine person who uses emotion to make decisions. As a teen, the idea of being a Feeling type was out of the question. I identified as being a rational, reasoning person. Yet, I liked barbie dolls and poetry, not whatever tomboy stuff INTPs were described as being into.

    So I scrapped the whole typology thing...

    Flash forward many years, and after reading Psychological Types and Van Der Hoop's Conscious Orientation, the Introverted Feeling type seemed to suit me best, although the Introveted Thinking type was also quite relatable. I've read a plethora of other books and over the past decade have identified as INFP. I have never discussed it with people I know IRL, until now.

    Recently among friends there was discussion of type, and everyone saw me as clearly being an INTP, which is usually how I test (but very close on T/F). When I tried to explain why I thought I was a feeling type, they said my way of explaining it made me sound like an INTP. Keep in mind their understanding is limited to Keirsey's ideas.

    So I feel I have a strong(er) grasp of the theory behind this than they do, but then again, maybe I have twisted it to suit my image of myself. Or maybe I don't see myself clearly and have twisted the image of myself to fit the theory and who I want to be. What if I am just an INTP woman in the grip of inferior Fe and in denial of not being a feeling type because of an inferior Fe inferiority complex of not being the typical, desirable female personality (ie SFJ)?

    I read an online article from some self-proclaimed Jungian type expert about INTPs and relationship struggles and it was scary dead on. The issues with Fe were not dumbed down to being emotionally detached or dismissive of emotions. Rather, it touched on insecurities which lead to social inhibitions and a kind of rebelliousness...

    Other people online who identify as INTP will relate to me, I frequently get compared to a relative who is an INTP (but male), and I have been told my reasoning is more Ti than Te (if you buy into the function stackings, which suggests INFPs may have limited Te; although I consider myself Te-stupid also). The differences is these INTPs will tell me I have a greater understanding of and dexterity in dealing with my own emotions and those of others (not in a social context; more of a theoretical one or as a counselor type).

    To throw a few more wrenches into it....I am highly likely an enneatype 4w5, which in MBTI sounds pretty much like INxP. But when I read Naranjo's type 5 description in Character and Neuroses, it sounded like the complaints people have made about my personality. I don't think I am a 5, but it demonstrates to me how my personality often appears.

    The thing is - I do have strong, nuanced emotions, I understand emotions within others (but less so exchanges of emotion), and I am not scared of complex, emotional matters.

    What I struggle with is more of Fe stuff. I am even wondering if my focused development on empathy was born out of the shame heaped on my head growing up for being "cold". I am continually baffled by social dynamics and thrown sideways by what feels like emotional manipulation (which I resist). This is the biggest problem in my life since I was born pretty much.

    Then I have a friend who I am quite certain is INFP, and she is like....really nice. I'm this cool, rational person in comparison, but I am also quite principled (or possessing of strong values?) and as noted, I consider myself empathetic. I am not truly detached, I am simply not WARM.

    This is less a "help me settle on a type" thread than trying to come to terms with being an INTP woman. Or worse - ditching this idiotic obsession of mine and being okay with the X in my type which drives my need for clarity batty.

  2. #2
    Member BIOTCH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Garbage_Doll View Post
    Hi! I have been researching typology for well over a decade as something of of a lesire pursuit (I am well aware it is more philosophy than scientific). FYI, I take types to be more about ego, or a general mentality one is always operating through, not literal thought processes, although I see the connection between it all.

    As a teen I tested clearly as INTP, and I admit it sounded like me, except NOT. It didn't suit me because it sounded like this cold sci-fi nerd, which I am not. I have always been more of an arty, creative person in terms of personal interests; although I did very well in all subjets in school, except PE. As an adult, I am drawn to psychospiritual matters. But the biggest objection I had was to how miserable it may INTPs sound. It hit on all the criticisms I had received growing up.

    I didn't even consider INFP because it was made to sound like a silly, saccharine person who uses emotion to make decisions. As a teen, the idea of being a Feeling type was out of the question. I identified as being a rational, reasoning person. Yet, I liked barbie dolls and poetry, not whatever tomboy stuff INTPs were described as being into.

    So I scrapped the whole typology thing...

    Flash forward many years, and after reading Psychological Types and Van Der Hoop's Conscious Orientation, the Introverted Feeling type seemed to suit me best, although the Introveted Thinking type was also quite relatable. I've read a plethora of other books and over the past decade have identified as INFP. I have never discussed it with people I know IRL, until now.

    Recently among friends there was discussion of type, and everyone saw me as clearly being an INTP, which is usually how I test (but very close on T/F). When I tried to explain why I thought I was a feeling type, they said my way of explaining it made me sound like an INTP. Keep in mind their understanding is limited to Keirsey's ideas.

    So I feel I have a strong(er) grasp of the theory behind this than they do, but then again, maybe I have twisted it to suit my image of myself. Or maybe I don't see myself clearly and have twisted the image of myself to fit the theory and who I want to be. What if I am just an INTP woman in the grip of inferior Fe and in denial of not being a feeling type because of an inferior Fe inferiority complex of not being the typical, desirable female personality (ie SFJ)?

    I read an online article from some self-proclaimed Jungian type expert about INTPs and relationship struggles and it was scary dead on. The issues with Fe were not dumbed down to being emotionally detached or dismissive of emotions. Rather, it touched on insecurities which lead to social inhibitions and a kind of rebelliousness...

    Other people online who identify as INTP will relate to me, I frequently get compared to a relative who is an INTP (but male), and I have been told my reasoning is more Ti than Te (if you buy into the function stackings, which suggests INFPs may have limited Te; although I consider myself Te-stupid also). The differences is these INTPs will tell me I have a greater understanding of and dexterity in dealing with my own emotions and those of others (not in a social context; more of a theoretical one or as a counselor type).

    To throw a few more wrenches into it....I am highly likely an enneatype 4w5, which in MBTI sounds pretty much like INxP. But when I read Naranjo's type 5 description in Character and Neuroses, it sounded like the complaints people have made about my personality. I don't think I am a 5, but it demonstrates to me how my personality often appears.

    The thing is - I do have strong, nuanced emotions, I understand emotions within others (but less so exchanges of emotion), and I am not scared of complex, emotional matters.

    What I struggle with is more of Fe stuff. I am even wondering if my focused development on empathy was born out of the shame heaped on my head growing up for being "cold". I am continually baffled by social dynamics and thrown sideways by what feels like emotional manipulation (which I resist). This is the biggest problem in my life since I was born pretty much.

    Then I have a friend who I am quite certain is INFP, and she is like....really nice. I'm this cool, rational person in comparison, but I am also quite principled (or possessing of strong values?) and as noted, I consider myself empathetic. I am not truly detached, I am simply not WARM.

    This is less a "help me settle on a type" thread than trying to come to terms with being an INTP woman. Or worse - ditching this idiotic obsession of mine and being okay with the X in my type which drives my need for clarity batty.
    The majority of females and males who test as INTP actually tend to be INFJs and INFP's. Please educate urselves on cognitive functions of INFJ's and INFP's

  3. #3
    Member Works's Avatar
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    Hi, welcome. Typing is imperfect.

  4. #4
    Member Garbage_Doll's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BIOTCH View Post
    The majority of females and males who test as INTP actually tend to be INFJs and INFP's. Please educate urselves on cognitive functions of INFJ's and INFP's
    Have done so for the past 10+ years.

  5. #5
    Member BIOTCH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Works View Post
    Hi, welcome. Typing is imperfect.
    Hello little Robin, have you seen the key?

  6. #6
    Member BIOTCH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Garbage_Doll View Post
    Have done so for the past 10+ years.
    ooo rly?? i'd like to hear about ur cognitive functions

  7. #7
    Member Garbage_Doll's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BIOTCH View Post
    ooo rly?? i'd like to hear about ur cognitive functions
    There are no literal cognitive functions that align with the 8 Jungian types.
    Jung didn't describe literal thought processes going on in the brain. He decribed ego types, which are more like identity or conscious orientation to reality.

    I already touched on that in the OP.

    It's pretty clear I know more than you do about types, LOL!

  8. #8
    Member BIOTCH's Avatar
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    Try educating urself brah instead of trying to be superior to others for the sake of being superior. Let's gain knowledge and share knowledge. No hate

  9. #9
    Member Garbage_Doll's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BIOTCH View Post
    Try educating urself brah instead of trying to be superior to others for the sake of being superior. Let's gain knowledge and share knowledge. No hate
    Someone is being more of a boob than a brah....and it's not me.

  10. #10
    Member BIOTCH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Garbage_Doll View Post
    Someone is being more of a boob than a brah....and it's not me.
    Nup it's called pyrate rum

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