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Thread: Do you have faith?

  1. #1
    Member Mxx's Avatar
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    Do you have faith?

    I'm not talking about silly religions, I'm talking about taking giant leaps in life where the outcome is uncertain.

    I do. I've taken some pretty huge leaps of faith in my life. I try to always at least have a parachute, but I've never been afraid to jump into life for a life worth pursuing.

    There was one area where I did not have faith: I didn't trust that I could confide my past in a partner. That it was always going to be too much of a burden, one big fat TMI. So I hid my past from the man I married, and all it ended up doing was make me feel so incredibly alone when I was with him. He didn't live with or love me, he loved the "remade for American audiences" purified version that extracted all the pain and tragedy. (Yes hard Ts, you can still be a T and acknowledge that pain and tragedy exists).

    There's a bit by Louis CK who talks about the balls a woman needs to have just to say yes to a date.



    Oh, and:


  2. #2
    Member Karl Pilkington's Avatar
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    this thread is deep.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Sinny's Avatar
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    No, not really.. No faith.

    I have instincts, I'll stick to those..

    And my instincts tell me that there are people out there who would marry you and still not be straight with you

    #trust-no-one.
    Those who begin coercive elimination of dissent soon find themselves exterminating dissenters. Compulsory unification of opinion achieves only the unanimity of the graveyard.

    ~ Robert Jackson, Statesman (1892-1954)


  4. #4
    Shiny and Eww Charde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mxx View Post
    There was one area where I did not have faith: I didn't trust that I could confide my past in a partner. That it was always going to be too much of a burden, one big fat TMI. So I hid my past from the man I married, and all it ended up doing was make me feel so incredibly alone when I was with him. He didn't live with or love me, he loved the "remade for American audiences" purified version that extracted all the pain and tragedy. (Yes hard Ts, you can still be a T and acknowledge that pain and tragedy exists).
    That is the part that sucks. Being in a relationship, I have determined, isn't worth it unless I don't have to hide shit. There's no sense in investing so much time and energy into something where I'll feel more alone than I regularly do (qualified statement: I'm content much of the time since I've always got things to do and think about, I just miss having people to be close to and it can become an echo chamber). I guess if someone can handle playing Cards Against Humanity with me and hearing the things I come up with, that's a good start...

    So yeah, what you describe actually doesn't seem to be uncommon. A lot of people put their best face forward to get someone, then feel like they can never let up / have to be on guard lest they get dumped. I've been through that phase of life and do not want ever to be there again. It is a cage. Of course, will I ever find someone who likes the "blemished" me and who is honest in return? Not sure, and not sure how to find them either. Oh well. But yeah, how do people find each other in a world like this? It's no wonder people struggle with balancing desire to be liked vs disclosure.

    ---

    The faith thing? I used to be scared a LOT. Everything was about mitigating risk and doubting my capabilities. But the world felt smaller because of that. I try to stretch myself a bit regular and trust my ability to cope nowadays -- having faith that there are chances I can take that I can in fact deal with, without a foolproof plan in place, and that I will rise to the occasion. I never jump off a cliff without a zipline or parachute, but at least I'm willing to jump off the cliff now depending.

  5. #5
    Member zago's Avatar
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    You have to have some faith. I think even knowledge requires faith. This could all be the Truman Show or some fucked up ancestor simulation. We could just be completely insane. To believe in truth takes a leap of faith. To me that's the foundation of everything, the first step.

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