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Thread: All Things Considered... 2013.

  1. #1
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    All Things Considered... 2013.

    Was it a remarkable year in any way? Or are you glad to leave it behind?

    After several years of scrambling to get my shit together, I feel like this year was positive overall:

    -Started working days instead of nights, which did a lot to reduce depression. It's amazing what a little sunlight can do.
    -Recommenced some modest political collaborations.
    -Contributed a bit of support and stability to some of my family members.
    -Renewed my rent contract, so I guess I can stop feeling like a squatter that's about to dump this place at any second.
    -Finally did some travelling, faced my fear of flying, and now I know that I don't want to stop.
    -Met some amazing online friends in the States.
    -Made a new group of coworker friends to go out drinking with.
    -Ended a relationship of more than 3 years which was draining the life out of me, and met someone new.

  2. #2
    Aporia Dysphoria Dirac's Avatar
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    Ups and downs I suppose.

    - Graduated after 5 years of uni. Actually managed a 1st which surprised and pleased me. SURPLEASED ME.
    - Failed abysmally to make a computer game and got a shit part-time job. Spent a lot of time doing nothing and fighting off depression.
    - Decided to apply for a PhD.

    Feels like a weird place to take stock though, my years have always felt like they are structured around an academic calendar.

  3. #3
    Member Mxx's Avatar
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    This year has flown by, and it seems like I never really stopped to recognize the small moments of significance.

    - Finally found a professional role aligned with my interests and skills, with compensation that has allowed me not to worry about money.
    - Upgraded apartment, with river views and surroundings that nurture INTP preferences.
    - Achieved a minor milestone in educational pursuits.
    - Severed the last remnants of family bondage and expectations.
    - Visited a foreign land that has planted seeds I look forward to watering.

    I still feel a big change in the horizon, but I still want to continue studies and get some more experience under my belt.
    The urge to walk away from everything is still with me, a constant companion who is mostly quiet - but becomes quite boisterous during the holiday season.

  4. #4
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    This year was a kind of upside-down bell curve in terms of things happening.

    -Started off with a new relationship that seemed promising. It was based on shared interests in activities and I felt like there was a good connection.
    -Relationship went toxic fast, and ended with an unplanned pregnancy. Narrowly avoided news of this reaching my ultra-religious family.
    -Went to a convention for the career that I thought I wanted to pursue, I/O psychology. Realized that I didn't want to pursue it.
    -Plunged into a more profound depression than I already had been in, started contemplating suicide daily.
    -Decided to pursue IT instead. Started down the path of getting Microsoft certified.
    -Joined a charity club dedicated to helping local underprivileged children, and involved myself in the monthly activities with them.
    -Overcame depression through medicine, and started actually living again.
    -Did some traveling and reignited my passion for seeing the world and living abroad. Decided to set aside IT aspirations for the time being in order to do what I actually want to do.
    -Stuck with a fitness routine all year long that allowed me to make new friends and achieve desired results.
    -New beginnings on the relationship front
    Last edited by Anon; 12-23-2013 at 01:24 AM.

  5. #5
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    It was a challenging year but I think I've grown a lot as a person.

    The good:
    - I relocated to the Pacific Northwest which has been a dream of mine since 2007
    - My woman went with me. I'm astonished to find myself at a place in life where I prefer quiet, peaceful healthy intimacy. Long gone are the days of hedonism. Our weekends are spent drinking wine, reading books, cooking and going for walks in nature.
    - She is growing as a person and that makes me happy
    - I took up a meditation practice

    The neutral:
    - Although my career was boosted significantly by coming here, I now find myself completely disinterested in my field and, as far as I can tell, wouldn't care at all if I had nothing to do with it ever again. I thought I was done having career crises, but that's apparently not the case. I worked so hard to obtain this and I've invested so much time and energy that I feel guilty over my ambivalence. And now? Now all I want to do is ...something else. It's to the point I'm about to quit this gong show of a career, cash it all in and work at Rite Aid until I figure out my next steps...

    ...which may be going into project management. I think I'd enjoy applying those skills to NPO's that make a measurable benefit on society. I've come to realize that I'm not so much an introvert as I am (or was) a "broken extrovert". The healthier and more mature I get, the more I enjoy working with others, inspiring them and feeling compelled to love them and aid them in some way. Not in an emotional sense, but in a humanitarian and practical sense. I once championed nastiness, dogged work ethic, and self-interest with a closed off orientation towards others. Now I regard that as infantile, though an understandable and necessary step in my personal evolution. It's been eschewed in favor of investing myself in others and, believe it or not, building upon the fundamental realization that I need them, and they need me.

    The bad:
    - My aunt died. Her death is less tragic than the effect it has had on my uncle. His remorse over his treatment of her is palpable as is his regret that it's too late to change or make amends. The lesson: treat people well and tell those you love that you do, in fact, love them. You don't get endless chances to do so.

  6. #6
    <3 gator's Avatar
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    My original post here was like 900 words of tl;dr that probably killed the thread.

    A very condensed version:

    I have gradually been getting unstuck, and though I have not yet changed my work and living situations I feel like I'm on the road to having those change soon.

    A lot of very serendipitous things happened this year and I have chosen to trust my gut, not overthink things and follow these opportunities to see where they lead. So far this has led to me ending up in a relationship with someone who I'm very compatible with and making plans to move to London mid-next year.

    Lots of personal growth this year. Though not a lot has changed outwardly, lots of my thoughts and beliefs have been changing. I'm also much happier than I was when the year started. I've been gradually pruning away old projects and relationships that no longer serve me and replacing them with new things that I'm more excited about, and which support my growth.

    However, my relationship with my family has suffered this year. A lot of distance has opened up between us and I can tell it hurts my parents a lot, but I don't feel any strong desire to counteract that. They were stifling me. It's important for me to be independent, to be able to make my own decisions and live with the consequences. Still, I feel guilt about it, and I don't really know what to do about that.

    Overall: net positive.
    Last edited by gator; 12-23-2013 at 06:18 AM.

  7. #7
    chaotic neutral shitpost
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    - found myself in limbo after graduating college
    - ended a long term relationship
    - lived outside the US (lol) for a few months, worked, learned that i can survive the extreme cold which is a big deal when you're from LA/california
    - worked a lot
    - read a lot
    - traveled a lot, saw a lot of new stuff
    - fell in love with someone i feel like i actually wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with. this shit is so serious
    - started raising chickens
    - in limbo forever

    2013 definitely wasn't boring. things were changing all the time, and it's one of the most amazing years i've had.
    Last edited by jigglypuff; 12-23-2013 at 06:11 AM.

  8. #8
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anonymous View Post
    -New beginnings on the relationship front
    Copycat.

  9. #9
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    Started the year seeing double. Ut's been my biggest health scare to date. No cause was ever found, but I strongly believe it was a reaction to stress.
    Realized that my attempts to improve my job situation by transferring to a less stressful position were being thwarted by management. The only other option was to find a new job elsewhere.
    Resigned myself to the fact that we would have to sell our house and move since neither rhinosaur or I had any hope of finding a job otherwise.
    Finished the house renovation that was started before my transfer plans were thwarted.
    Husband finally finished school in May.
    Husband threw me a curve ball by taking a temporary contract position in Boston. Husband moved out in June.
    Double vision finally cleared up around July.
    Made significant profit off company stock. That is the only good thing I have to say about my job.
    Made some minor and ultimately unsuccessful efforts to find a job in the Boston area.
    Tried to get used to the idea of moving to Boston. Failed.
    Decided to put the house on the market and look for a new job.
    Quit old job before selling the house or finding a new job. Thank god for all that stock option money.
    Took a long needed vacation, visited friends and relatives, and did other things that I never had time for while working.

    There is a lot of uncertainty about my future at the moment. It is simultaneously exhilarating and terrifying. It is still less stressful than the crappy job that I quit. I'm actually more comfortable with not knowing what's next than I thought I would be. I just wish people would quit asking me what my plans are, because I don't know yet.

  10. #10
    Meae Musae Servus Hephaestus's Avatar
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    Hmm... started by staving off the most destruction oriented depression I've faced yet. Had fun playing house. Enjoyed Magic Mountain. Did not have fun watching house break apart. Talked with my dad about the drugs I'd been using to manage my depression--while extremely fucking high and terrified. Watched my job dwindle to nothing. Went back on food stamps. Went back to selling blood plasma to make ends meet. Gained about half the weight I lost last year in the last two months because the background depression has been eating me into eating like I was still exercising a ton but unmotivated to exercise a ton.

    I learned a great deal this year about worlds I'd never before set foot into. I've taken more steps on the patch of perspective shattering, and I credit that with making the most destructive force of my current winter depression being to my waistline rather than to my lifeline.

    I'd rank this as among the bottom 3 years of my life--and the top 10. Maybe top 5.

    That might seem odd but keep in mind... I'm still pretty young. My reasonable possible healthy lifespan isn't quite half over.
    Last edited by Hephaestus; 12-23-2013 at 07:00 AM.

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