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Thread: The Poo Thread

  1. #31
    chaotic neutral jigglypuff's Avatar
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    lol Heph... yeah i thought you meant pooping. i stand to wipe. in my head, this is happening in a public restroom and i don’t want my hand anywhere near the toilet water. at home i use the bidet to rinse, then i probably sit to wipe cuz it’s dripping. i don’t remember exactly but that seems most logical.
    The most beautiful paintings in existence today are the ones which were not painted by anyone.

  2. #32
    Meae Musae Servus Hephaestus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by oxyjen View Post
    I am an asshole leaner-wiper, though I can't recall ever breaking a toilet seat. It's imperative to wipe front to back and you have to do the side lean to avoid getting your arm and hand so low that it might accidentally touch toilet water.

    There's a reason for the madness.

    If you try to wipe when standing, the cheeks don't spread as easy to get a quick clean swipe.
    There's a hip-tilt half squat that I use that works just fine for me. When I was nearly 100lbs heavier, I'd use my free hand to pull one cheek aside. But I understand staying out of the bowl--one knuckle comes back dirty and you adapt stat.
    --Mention of these things is so taboo, they aren't even allowed a name for the prohibition. It is just not done.

  3. #33
    non-canonical Light Leak's Avatar
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    I just use a flushable wet wipe when I need to make sure I'm clean. Or if I'm not at home I have been known to dampen a piece of TP.

  4. #34
    ..you don't know me LordLatch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Light Leak View Post
    I just use a flushable wet wipe when I need to make sure I'm clean. Or if I'm not at home I have been known to dampen a piece of TP.
    Known to? Who knew? Do you gather spectators in preparation? That's fricken weird, Light Leak!
    This just in: I'm accepting all friend requests too unless you're a fricken jerk and I can't stand your existence and inane drivel. If that's the case, then I'll accept your friend request so I can keep an eye on your ass unless you don't hold any interest for me; then only the threat of keeping my eye on you stands. feces

  5. #35
    non-canonical Light Leak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LordLatch View Post
    Known to? Who knew? Do you gather spectators in preparation? That's fricken weird, Light Leak!
    No spectators. I've told people I do this before so they know.

  6. #36
    ..you don't know me LordLatch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Light Leak View Post
    No spectators. I've told people I do this before so they know.
    Then they don't really know. They take your word for it. Maybe you just say that to get popular.
    This just in: I'm accepting all friend requests too unless you're a fricken jerk and I can't stand your existence and inane drivel. If that's the case, then I'll accept your friend request so I can keep an eye on your ass unless you don't hold any interest for me; then only the threat of keeping my eye on you stands. feces

  7. #37
    non-canonical Light Leak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LordLatch View Post
    Then they don't really know. They take your word for it. Maybe you just say that to get popular.
    I didn't realize that was something that would make me popular. Maybe I should start telling more people.

  8. #38
    ..you don't know me LordLatch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Light Leak View Post
    I didn't realize that was something that would make me popular. Maybe I should start telling more people.
    You are going to need one of these. Then you'll be a real head turner.
    This just in: I'm accepting all friend requests too unless you're a fricken jerk and I can't stand your existence and inane drivel. If that's the case, then I'll accept your friend request so I can keep an eye on your ass unless you don't hold any interest for me; then only the threat of keeping my eye on you stands. feces

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