Being Human

[Makers!*]

That unimaginable nothing welling inside you will one day rise out of a deep and painful suffering until it brims over, hollows your eyes, and voids the memories of loved ones past, as the mind goes blank; that joy and love and the contentment of the sun on your back are chemical fluxes subject to shift; and that your struggle, your triumphs--everything you’ve know and fought for--will be erased by time; that's what dropped on me the other morning, at 2:00 a.m., drunk and alone before realizing that there is nothing I could do about, and so fell soundly asleep.

Anyone else get these moments? ...or maybe others, more profound.

[99Problems]

This is a major reason why people need their gods, not everyone has the mental capacity to accept the unpleasantness of it all. Drink while you still can.

[Madrigal]

At around the same time yesterday I was wondering what options the world has without socialism. It wasn't really just an idle thought, I actually took a moment to think about it as if I had never thought about it before. I'm not sure those moments are good symptoms though.

Anyway, Makers, you remind me of the immortal Raymond Fosca from All Men Are Mortal. He (or Simone de Beauvoir speaking through him) concludes the same thing, but only as a consequence of his immortality. Because he can see for himself that the passions that drive humans to change themselves and the world eventually fail and are replaced by new passions carried by new people who are just as blind to their ultimate failure as the last generation. But at the same time it's what makes their lives worth living, while he who is immortal has nothing to live for.

[Makers!*]

At around the same time yesterday I was wondering what options the world has without socialism. It wasn't really just an idle thought, I actually took a moment to think about it as if I had never thought about it before. I'm not sure those moments are good symptoms though.

Symptoms are the sign of a deeper need not being addressed. People don't give themselves enough time to contemplate, because they don't like where their mind takes them, and so we create things to distract ourselves. But it must be necessary to go the dark, abject places and reconcile our condition, or otherwise be confronted by it in the terrific moments before our death or the death of the ones we love. In life, I believe the best solace may be found in the company of others who share our condition, or art which has the ability to diffuse our worries by orienting them within a larger landscape. An occasional beverage to slow the mind works too.

Anyway, Makers, you remind me of the immortal Raymond Fosca from All Men Are Mortal. He (or Simone de Beauvoir speaking through him) concludes the same thing, but only as a consequence of his immortality. Because he can see for himself that the passions that drive humans to change themselves and the world eventually fail and are replaced by new passions carried by new people who are just as blind to their ultimate failure as the last generation. But at the same time it's what makes their lives worth living, while he who is immortal has nothing to live for.

I MET a Traveler from an antique land,
Who said, "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read,
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is OZYMANDIAS, King of Kings."
Look on my works ye Mighty, and despair!
No thing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that Colossal Wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

- "Ozymandias," Perce Shelley

[mthomps]

For what it's worth after the fact you'll have no idea what happened.

[Hermione]

I totally have moments of being human. Sometimes, I do.



This is actually an excellent thread idea, and I want to post about those deep profound things I've come up with in my own personal philosophy of my life. That we do need way more time to contemplate, reflect, reorganize our brains or our philosophies I have no doubt. I'm so glad you mentioned that in the OP which was worded succinctly and also contained some wisdom. Keep thinking, and keep the thread going. I want to post when I haven't had way too many hours of Non-reflection time (work). I do like my work, but I sure do miss the old profound, reflective, intense, and brooding self. I like that self. (human srsly). Thanks, makers for another thought I needed to hear at the right moment. The fact that we can do nothing about our nothingness, is neither here nor there. It isn't even the point. What you are doing, that's the point. Salute, sir.

[Roger Mexico]

I don't know. Oddly enough the thought of my own cosmic insignificance has tended to be relaxing to me more often than it's been a source of anxiety throughout my life. As in "you know what? None of this will matter in a hundred years, so fuck it, I'm just here for the ride and should enjoy it."

It's those "but but does this action properly represent the full extent of my potential, the essence of my being, and the way I want to be remembered?" moments that give me panic sweats. "I'm an invisible dust mote in both space and time" is actually a big part of how I talk myself down from those.


Probably a consequence of my upbringing--oldest child in a family with parents whose self-esteem kind of appeared to hinge on the prospect of their children being exceptionally good at things. (It's not enough to do things right--I have to do them in a way that will impress people with my ingenuity as well as contain some unique touch that serves as proof of my personal authorship--and everything is my responsibility whether it has anything to do with me or not.)

I imagine everyone vacillates between those two poles from time to time. The grass is always greener. If you ask me, our brains have evolved to imagine the prospect of happiness because this drives us to propagate and shape our environment, but experiencing happiness more than is necessary for this dynamic to exist would be counterproductive in that respect, so we're ingrates and malcontents by nature's design. No matter how good we have it, we just wouldn't be human if we couldn't think of something to complain about.

[Hermione]

It never really even hit me until I had an accident and was almost killed, for real. I was in a coma for a couple days, intensive care for a week I think. But who knows really, since I don't remember that part anyway. That was when it really hit me, a month later after I was able to connect a few dots. I think I felt better then and not worse.

[False Azure]

[Hermione]

Being conscious is really all that there is. To become fully conscious, or what Jung called individuation. It's like levelling up. It's really almost a different plane. I used to always quip that if I seemed spacy or detached it was just that I was 'looping Jupiter'. Now I just try to keep most all of it in mind. That said, I do have to limit all the tawdry things that I allow into consciousness. There is just so much that really is a huge waste. Being real isn't a waste. It's real, like the velveteen rabbit. Better than being tossed out. Survival is a very nice thing.