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Thread: Inability to sustain a long-term relationship

  1. #21
    Senior Member Sinny's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by starla View Post
    You do not have a personality disorder. Especially not for someone living in Florida.

    I, too, have emasculated many men. I never changed. You just need to find one who isn't so easy to emasculate.
    Amen.
    When tyranny becomes law
    Rebellion becomes duty.



  2. #22
    unbeknownst Lilith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madrigal View Post
    Is there a right answer to this?
    For all we know rokki is a serial heartbreaker, no?

    Seriously though, she said her relationships last 3-6 months. If it’s a recurring theme in recent years for the same reason, perhaps it’s best to evaluate. If something (behavior/thought)is pervasive, it’s unhealthy. I wouldn’t say there is a right or wrong answer, more like healthy and unhealthy behaviors.

    Quote Originally Posted by rokki balbotox View Post
    I guess so

    Shit, four or five. All except for my kids dad they broke up with me for what I will call me emasculating them, (I am historically attracted to girly men so it doesnt help), and my kid's dad purposely sabotaged our relationship (lots of legal drama in that one)
    Yeah, you’re probably better finding someone who doesn’t mind you “wearing the pants”.

  3. #23
    Cooler than Jesus
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    Quote Originally Posted by jigglypuff View Post

    i relate to impulsively wanting to break up and i actually experience that on a regular basis, but after figuring out where that was coming from for me, that urge holds way less power now.
    Quote Originally Posted by rokki balbotox View Post
    Well, howd you figure out where that urge was coming from?
    Curious about that as well. I tend to get the same urge, but it always seems to be rooted in a desire to generally escape from responsibility (answering to anyone but myself) and hide. Same as when I get an urge to quit, move, etc.

  4. #24
    Señor member Limes's Avatar
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    You could be a sociopath. It could also be what makes you more interesting than the vast majority of ISFPs
    Do you start to think or even fantasize about your SO being killed in an accident?

    It might be worth thinking about what "checking out emotionally" actually means on a more granular examination, then try to pin down a root cause so you can attempt to triangulate where it's going and potentially redress,
    Sabor original

  5. #25
    Hasta Siempre Madrigal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Limes View Post
    Do you start to think or even fantasize about your SO being killed in an accident?


    I used to, but that was a long time ago (in my 20s).
    Quote Originally Posted by Hephaestus View Post
    Heh. We've been here years now.

  6. #26
    Psychopathy is charisma.

    I think you're merely a 90s baby or at least 87-89. Yeah 87 or 89 seems more apt. You grew up listening to system of a down, partied in your 20s, now you're 30 and single and the dating pool is slim pickings. Get used to a life of hoes. That's what I'm committed to. Jk.
    abstractionist

  7. #27
    Senior Member rokki balbotox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grape Johnson View Post
    Psychopathy is charisma.

    I think you're merely a 90s baby or at least 87-89. Yeah 87 or 89 seems more apt. You grew up listening to system of a down, partied in your 20s, now you're 30 and single and the dating pool is slim pickings. Get used to a life of hoes. That's what I'm committed to. Jk.
    This is spot on, and I have a girlfriend (someone where I can wear the pants). I just recently have been thinking of dumping her due to her irresponsibility with finances, but she is making 3x as much as she used to starting tomorrow (her first paycheck), so maybe that'll change my mind

    The psychopathy and sociopathy thing, I'd actually say I had deficient emotional empathy most of my life until I spent a few years in the military, which is odd cuz I think it wouldn't be wrong to think that the military would desensitize/affect empathy whatever you want to say, but I figure it was the opposite in my case. Made me a more compassionate person, although I'm not sure if that or simply getting older, maybe a combination of both, maybe neither

    I will admit that I force myself to mirror yawns as it doesn't come natural to me. And the only people whose death I fantasize about are people who have taken the lives of others or maimed/dismembered/raped or whatever. Although I'll admit I did wish my kids dad died once but to be fair he deserved that

  8. #28
    Señor member Limes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rokki balbotox View Post
    This is spot on, and I have a girlfriend (someone where I can wear the pants). I just recently have been thinking of dumping her due to her irresponsibility with finances, but she is making 3x as much as she used to starting tomorrow (her first paycheck), so maybe that'll change my mind

    The psychopathy and sociopathy thing, I'd actually say I had deficient emotional empathy most of my life until I spent a few years in the military, which is odd cuz I think it wouldn't be wrong to think that the military would desensitize/affect empathy whatever you want to say, but I figure it was the opposite in my case. Made me a more compassionate person, although I'm not sure if that or simply getting older, maybe a combination of both, maybe neither

    I will admit that I force myself to mirror yawns as it doesn't come natural to me. And the only people whose death I fantasize about are people who have taken the lives of others or maimed/dismembered/raped or whatever. Although I'll admit I did wish my kids dad died once but to be fair he deserved that
    None of this explains why your taste in women appears to include those who, if they were male, look like their name would be Chet, or Greg. mmm-mmm girlfriend *head pivot* you need to kick that femullet to the curb.
    Sabor original

  9. #29
    chaotic neutral shitpost jigglypuff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NedLudd View Post
    Curious about that as well. I tend to get the same urge, but it always seems to be rooted in a desire to generally escape from responsibility (answering to anyone but myself) and hide. Same as when I get an urge to quit, move, etc.
    for me it's not about wanting to escape responsibility, but wanting to not trap myself into a bad/abusive situation, basically.

    the fear of being trapped kicks in and the thought that goes through my mind is "i'm not going to let myself be treated like THIS for the rest of my life." totally rational if i'm dealing with an abusive situation, but i haven't had abusive (or mean, cruel, etc.) relationships. it's just a non-thinking knee-jerk response to whatever.

    i didn't have good models for healthy relationships growing up and the relationship i'm referencing in my head totally warrants that.

    also, i just responded to this twice, two days ago in a private area of the forum... same thing, but i'm wording it differently today.
    i sneeze like a grandpa.

  10. #30
    Senior Member rokki balbotox's Avatar
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    It's got to be hard to recognize that and then to overcome it when it's easier to just not deal with any of it

    I want to put forth more effort into working shit out instead of telling myself to "not worry about things I can't control" and then letting go of the thing I cant control instead of just waiting it out

    --

    Limes. You're funny I'll give you that. But you're shallow, and you should be ashamed of yourself for picking on my gf

    You look like the thumb version of principal Skinner

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