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Thread: What wrongs would you like to see made right in your lifetime?

  1. #11
    Senior Member Starjots's Avatar
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    I'm not sure where to start. Are there one or two root problems that lie at the heart of our collective problems? That's what I'd wish for.

    Is this just human nature at work, some natural, inevitable cycle we are running through? I'd have to say - no on that one. Too much fundamental stuff is changing within recent lifetimes -- available energy, information access (and manipulation), education, etc.

    But it does feel like our capacity to adjust is being outrun by the future arriving too quickly -- future shock, to use the phrase Alan Toeffler coined fifty years ago. We've got the solutions to most of our problems right now, but we're like two spouses who can't agree on who takes out the trash, and then the car breaks down, and then the toilet overflows, and the roof starts leaking, and mice move into the garage, and the tree blows onto the house during a storm, and their kid starts using drugs, and their barking dog is driving he neighbors insane -- and they're still arguing about who is supposed to take out the fucking trash.

  2. #12
    TJ TeresaJ's Avatar
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    ^ Yes.

  3. #13
    Ieilaelite pensive_pilgrim's Avatar
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    The USA has the highest rate of children living in single-parent homes in the world. Nearly 1/4 of children. That proportion has been growing steadily The overwhelming majority of those single parents are women - about 1/5 of children are living with a solo mom. Women initiate about 80% of divorces, and are awarded custody in about 90% of cases.

    The statistics on the effect of being raised in a fatherless home are clear and conclusive:
    children from fatherless homes account for:
    • Suicide: 63 percent of youth suicides
    • Runaways: 90 percent of all homeless and runaway youths
    • Behavioral Disorders: 85 percent of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders
    • High School Dropouts: 71 percent of all high school dropouts
    • Juvenile Detention Rates: 70 percent of juveniles in state-operated institutions
    • Substance Abuse: 75 percent of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers
    • Aggression: 75 percent of rapists motivated by displaced anger


    The suicide rate has been rising steadily for the last couple of decades - for women. For men it has skyrocketed to the highest level since the 80s, in the middle of the AIDS crisis. For people under 34, it's the second leading cause of death, just below "poisonings". It's often hard to tell whether heroin overdoses were intentional.

    I could go on to talk about the number of kids in foster care, where the statistics on outcomes are even worse.

    And I could talk about the shockingly high suicide rate for fathers who have been alienated from their children.

    There is something very wrong with our culture that is primarily harming our kids, especially boys and young men. Children need fathers. They need positive male role models. They need familial models of healthy relationships. This is our future as a country on the line.

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by pensive_pilgrim View Post
    The USA has the highest rate of children living in single-parent homes in the world. Nearly 1/4 of children. That proportion has been growing steadily The overwhelming majority of those single parents are women - about 1/5 of children are living with a solo mom. Women initiate about 80% of divorces, and are awarded custody in about 90% of cases.

    The statistics on the effect of being raised in a fatherless home are clear and conclusive:
    children from fatherless homes account for:
    • Suicide: 63 percent of youth suicides
    • Runaways: 90 percent of all homeless and runaway youths
    • Behavioral Disorders: 85 percent of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders
    • High School Dropouts: 71 percent of all high school dropouts
    • Juvenile Detention Rates: 70 percent of juveniles in state-operated institutions
    • Substance Abuse: 75 percent of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers
    • Aggression: 75 percent of rapists motivated by displaced anger


    The suicide rate has been rising steadily for the last couple of decades - for women. For men it has skyrocketed to the highest level since the 80s, in the middle of the AIDS crisis. For people under 34, it's the second leading cause of death, just below "poisonings". It's often hard to tell whether heroin overdoses were intentional.

    I could go on to talk about the number of kids in foster care, where the statistics on outcomes are even worse.

    And I could talk about the shockingly high suicide rate for fathers who have been alienated from their children.

    There is something very wrong with our culture that is primarily harming our kids, especially boys and young men. Children need fathers. They need positive male role models. They need familial models of healthy relationships. This is our future as a country on the line.
    Lack of a father in the home could be a symptom, not a cause. Correlation =/= causation. Fucked up people have fucked up relationships and fucked up kids.

    Also, poisonings? Are these alcohol related?

  5. #15
    Senior Member jyng1's Avatar
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    Women likely initiate 80% of divorces because in 80% of relationships that break down men are unfaithful or abusive or both.

  6. #16
    Ieilaelite pensive_pilgrim's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by starla View Post
    Lack of a father in the home could be a symptom, not a cause. Correlation =/= causation. Fucked up people have fucked up relationships and fucked up kids.
    Poverty is the root cause of most divorces, but it's not the reason that women overwhelmingly receive custody and more support in single parenthood. There is a strong cultural mindset in our society that fathers aren't important and aren't as suited to childcare. A single father is more likely to be viewed with suspicion than sympathy. A father faces an uphill battle in family court. Many fathers, when they see these things stacking up against them, choose to give up.

    Also, poisonings? Are these alcohol related?
    The poisonings are mostly opiate-related. We are still in the midst of an epidemic of drug abuse and suicide, and like I said, it's often hard to tell whether an overdose was intentional.

    Quote Originally Posted by jyng1
    Women likely initiate 80% of divorces because in 80% of relationships that break down men are unfaithful or abusive or both.
    Women initiate more divorces because they have more to gain and less to lose from doing so. Women can be assured that they will have an easier time getting a favorable custody arrangement if that's what they want, and if they make less money (which they generally do, because they generally work less than men), they can be assured that the state will force the divorced father to send money to her to spend as she sees fit.

    I hate to use a loaded word but you're demonstrating exactly the kind of sexist attitude that allows many women to spitefully deny fathers access to their children, harming the children in the process. It's the assumption that women can do no wrong and that all women are angels who naturally care deeply for their children and would never do anything to harm them for their own gain.

  7. #17
    Now we know... Asteroids Champion ACow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pensive_pilgrim View Post
    The poisonings are mostly opiate-related. We are still in the midst of an epidemic of drug abuse and suicide, and like I said, it's often hard to tell whether an overdose was intentional.
    When I was working with mortality data, we called them the "suicide euphemisms".

    Overdose (yeah, 40x the prescribed amount will do that), accidental death (they didn't mean to kill themselves, they just downed 40x the safe dose, or they slit their wrists in the bath but really it was just a cry for attention :\), car accident (accidentally drove off a cliff alone at 3am in the morning with no indication of breaking or choked to death on carbon monoxide).

    Most places still have huge cultural/structural barriers to coming to terms with or recognising suicide...

    /cool story bro

  8. #18
    Senior Member jyng1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pensive_pilgrim View Post
    I hate to use a loaded word but you're demonstrating exactly the kind of sexist attitude
    Funny thing to say when your whole thesis is a misogynistic rant against divorced single mothers. Particularly considering both widowed and divorced single mothers appear to do financially worse than both divorced men and married couples.


  9. #19
    A Transient Configuration Sistamatic's Avatar
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    Anyone paying attention to the suicide rates of American Indigenous? Want to talk about alarming. 16% of indigenous american youth report attempting suicide. Rates of suicide in indigenous women have gone up 139% in the last 20 years. Up 79% for indigenous men.
    Want to know why? Google MMIW stats. It's one of those things no one talks about on the news, but it's ubiquitous in the lives of the few remaining indigenous people of this country. The very last part of the OG culture of this continent is pretty much being raped to death. You know, fyi. I mean if we are talking about what demographic is in the most dire straights based on suicide rates, I think our indigenous qualify.
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  10. #20
    malarkey oxyjen's Avatar
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    I'd like to see the statistics on father absences, as I suspect most of them have to do with father abandonment rather than spousal alienation/estrangement from divorce cases. By an overwhelming factor.

    So agreed that fathers need to see their role as being just as important as mom's.

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