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Thread: Can an artist statement ever be too inappropriate?

  1. #1
    Senior Member Tetris Champion notdavidlynch's Avatar
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    Can an artist statement ever be too inappropriate?

    I just sent this off to a prof coordinating a show. Maybe it'll dawn on them how much I fucking hate them. Or maybe they just won't put it up.

    Hello, my name is notdavidlynch. I am a senior art major at UCSB. I majored in art because I donít want a real job when I graduate. My paintings are usually made in an aggressive and agitated mental state.

    I had these two filing cabinets that I was using as squat stands and <name removed> got rid of them without asking me, hence the painting of his face. I had to spend a bunch of money to get a real pair of squat stands. Thanks <name removed>.

    When I made the second, untitled painting, I was thinking about how much I hate performance art. I set out to make a really bad painting, confident that no matter how bad it was, it would interest me more than any piece of performance art in the history of the world. I decided that I wanted to start over and began to clean off the canvas with running water, but then decided that Iíd rather just go home and go to sleep, so I left it sitting there. Later on someone said they liked it, and I was like LOL do you even art bro?

  2. #2
    know nothing pensive_pilgrim's Avatar
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    I think you should be more honest. What you wrote reads like it was written to elicit a certain reaction. I don't know anything about art, though, I just always though it was supposed to be really authentic, even to the point of making people uncomfortable. I like the middle paragraph.

  3. #3
    chaotic neutral shitpost
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    trolly statements would be fine if they were well-written.* that kind of statement makes you sound perpetually undergrad, like you can't see a future beyond being a student, imo.

    "i don't want a real job" but you do want a real job, an art job. you want some way to make a living. that's what i mean...

    * OR if the work was undeniably kick-ass, the kind that speaks for itself. is it? and can you answer that honestly?
    The most beautiful paintings in existence today are the ones which were not painted by anyone.

  4. #4
    凸(ಠ_ರೃ )凸 stuck's Avatar
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    Put some effort into your contempt!

  5. #5
    creator kari's Avatar
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    I don't think he would understand the subtlety of your wit.
    I fucking hate the cold! - Wim Hof

  6. #6
    Senior Member Tetris Champion notdavidlynch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pathogenetic_peripatetic View Post
    I think you should be more honest. What you wrote reads like it was written to elicit a certain reaction. I don't know anything about art, though, I just always though it was supposed to be really authentic, even to the point of making people uncomfortable. I like the middle paragraph.
    I pretty much described exactly what happened. I don't know how I can get more authentic than that. Perhaps this is a testament to my immaturity.

    Quote Originally Posted by tele View Post
    trolly statements would be fine if they were well-written.* that kind of statement makes you sound perpetually undergrad, like you can't see a future beyond being a student, imo.

    "i don't want a real job" but you do want a real job, an art job. you want some way to make a living. that's what i mean...
    I want to make art, but I definitely don't want an "art job", or any other kind of job for that matter. I genuinely think that being an art major is good prep for carving out your own, jobless niche in life.

    ---

    But, bam. 4 reactions, all negative. It's a winner.

  7. #7
    凸(ಠ_ರೃ )凸 stuck's Avatar
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    You need to watch some TED talks bro.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Space Invaders Champion Fitz's Avatar
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    You're an artist it's not like anyone's ever going to take you seriously. Just do whatever. If it goes bad, claim it was a performance piece and that your audience was to uncultured to get it.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Tetris Champion notdavidlynch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stuck View Post
    You need to watch some TED talks bro.
    I recently visited a gallery and one of the pieces was a lawn chair with a block of wood placed in front of it. On top of the block of wood was an uncooked vegan sausage.

    I don't think contemporary art is necessarily about ideas worth spreading. I wish it were. It's more of a game.

  10. #10
    I'm surprisingly (to myself) picky about art. That lawn chair shit you just described sounds less like art and more like a friggen insult to people's intelligence. Sure, a lot of people's intelligence should be insulted, but when they tell me that I should enjoy it and am too *whatever* to *get* it, then it goes beyond stupid. Leaving me, for the most part, thinking contemporary artists aren't artists; they're jokes. Worse, they're useless, unfunny jokes. Your OP letter sounds like an entitled, lazy teenager, sure, but it was still more entertaining and honest than a lot of crap people call art these days.

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