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Thread: Unplayable Video Games

  1. #1
    凸(ಠ_ರೃ )凸 stuck's Avatar
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    Unplayable Video Games

    To set the tone:

    QWOP:

    http://www.foddy.net/Athletics.html

    DARK CASTLE


  2. #2
    Aporia Dysphoria Dirac's Avatar
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    Did you ever play CLOP? That was good too.

  3. #3
    Persona Oblongata OrionzRevenge's Avatar
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    Wtf? Even with modern gamepads you can't control the bitch.

    Now, this was a sensible game:



    Agreeable Physics
    You had to WORK to enjoy your quarter. Flap those Pecs!
    Entire arena in one heads-up
    Blue-on-Blue accidents or cut-throat in 2 player mode.

  4. #4
    igKnight Hephaestus's Avatar
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    Dude. Defender? You can't play Defender?!!

    You know there are more than one planet right?

    Fastest way to the next stage in the Apple version was to shoot all the people. Well, you lost the planet but you got to fight in space.

    To be fair, when I first ran across a Defender cabinet, I thought my skillz would translate. I was terribly wrong.
    --Mention of these things is so taboo, they aren't even allowed a name for the prohibition. It is just not done.

  5. #5
    Persona Oblongata OrionzRevenge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hephaestus View Post
    Dude. Defender? You can't play Defender?!!

    You know there are more than one planet right?

    Fastest way to the next stage in the Apple version was to shoot all the people. Well, you lost the planet but you got to fight in space.

    To be fair, when I first ran across a Defender cabinet, I thought my skillz would translate. I was terribly wrong.
    Confessions of a clutz.

    everywhere you turn it's like: This control panel was designed for alien hands/tentacles, muscled testicles or something.

    And when you need to make a split-second jump to Hyper-Space, where is the Hyper-Space Button?
    ...In fucking Hyper-Space!

  6. #6
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    INTPx Award Winner

  7. #7
    a fool on a journey pensive_pilgrim's Avatar
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    Do these count?

  8. #8
    Member mthomps's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pathogenetic_peripatetic View Post
    Do these count?

  9. #9
    Member rhinosaur's Avatar
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    When I was a kid, this one was pretty much incomprehensible:



    I think I attempted to play it twice in the entire time we had the Atari.

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